Put Your Heart On Mine
by SereneCalamity
Summary: They weren't friends, and they weren't pack. But Jace would die for her without a moment of hesitation. Mates/Werewolf AU. Clace.
1. Chapter 1

_That time of year for new stories! I absolutely love this one, I started it a couple of months ago and I'm having so much fun. I hope you guys enjoy it as well._

 _Disclaimer: I do not own the characters._

Clarissa Fray pursed her lips together, rolling her shoulders and closing her eyes for a few beats. She could hear everything going on around her, right down to the guy who sat three desks over and had an annoying habit of grinding his teeth. That was just meant to be something people did at _night_ , and yet she had to put up with this through the day. Then there was the girl in the office down the hall, one of the executives at the company, who had been having phone sex for the past ten minutes.

And it had been _bad_ phone sex.

It had Clary cringing at her desk and wrinkling her nose.

Then there were the normal, intense mingling of smells that were filling the place—cheap perfume, _expensive_ perfume, a range of different shampoo and conditioners, body odor—usually these were all things that Clary could drown out.

But it had been getting harder and harder lately.

For the past thirteen months and two days, to be exact.

Clary took in a deep breath and got up from her seat, walking toward the bathroom, her heels clipping on the tiled floors. There had been carpet when she had first started here, which had been good on the hearing, the shuffle and smack and slap of shoes and heels on the tiles frustrated her no end, sharp and grating on her eardrums, but then the downside of carpet was that _so much_ got caught up in the strands, spillages from peoples coffee and plates as they walked over it, and what got dragged in on their shoes, and that irritated her nose.

The problems with working in a building with hundreds of other people.

Or...The problems when her wolf was constantly on edge, scratching at her insides, snapping over every frustrating move, whining inside her head.

She pushed open the bathroom door, and her eyes rolled at the sharp smell of disinfectant mixed together with the huge array of flowers on the vanity unit that was trying to mask that chemical smell. She went into the toilet stall farthest from the vanity—she liked the smell of flowers as much as the next girl, but there were far too many in this tiny room, and mingled together with the chemicals, it was bordering on nauseating.

If she had the actual capability of being sick, she'd be throwing up.

Clary sat down on the closed toilet lid, resting her elbows on her knees and then burying her head in her hands. She took in some deep breaths through her mouth, purposefully not through her nose, and tried to quiet her mind.

Tried to quiet her wolf.

It had been getting worse, a hell of a lot worse in the past few weeks.

She could feel her wolf scratching and crying out, she felt as though she was constantly on edge, the little hairs on her arms and the back of her neck were always sticking up and there was a pounding in the back of her head that sounded like what humans said headaches were. She couldn't sleep properly, her dreams were all weird and complex and there were dark shapes that moved out of the shadows and made it feel as though she was being consumed, and through the day she found it hard to concentrate and focus on her work, even though she loved what she did.

" _Fuck_ ," Clary hissed out, turning her nails inward so that they pressed into her head. She kept on pressing, harder and harder, until she felt a trickle of blood and then she sighed and stopped, pulling her hands away. There were drops of blood under each of the three middle nails on both hand and she pressed her lips together as she sighed again. She got up off the toilet seat, smoothing her hands down over the dark grey pencil skirt that she was wearing and unlocked the door of the stall. She walked over the sinks, putting some soap on her hands and washing them, the blood turning pink as it mingled together with the water and slid down the sink. She ran her fingers through her hair, shaking it out so that it wasn't so obvious where she had pressed her hands against, and she knew that the little crescent indents that she had made with her nails would already be healed.

When she got back to her desk, she didn't bother sitting down. She picked up her phone and her bag and continued walking, down the hallway toward the main receptionist desk and then to the elevators. After she pressed the button to go down, she dialed the contact that was listed as her top favourite in the her contacts.

"Clary?" Simon Lewis' voice filtered through.

"I need you. Now," she stated as the doors dinged open and she stepped inside.

"I can be at your apartment in twenty five."

* * *

Clary felt better.

Not great, but better.

"Thanks," she murmured as she sat up on her couch, swinging her legs off where they had been stretched out and putting them on the ground. She could feel the waves of magic still rolling over her skin, acting as a cover up, not an actual fix to her problem, and she closed her eyes and took in a few deep breaths.

"Here," Simon said quietly, picking up her shirt from where it had been tossed and passing it back to her. Clary took it and twisted the thin material around in her hands before tugging it over her head. "It's not going to keep working, Clary," he murmured and she sighed, rubbing a hand over her face. Her make up was nowhere near as perfect as it had been, smeared and smudged from the sweat that had built up throughout her session with Simon. The room was dimly lit, none of the lights turned on, and the only light was coming through the thin slats of the wooden blinds that Clary had mostly turned all the way shut.

"It's working for now," Clary muttered, even though she knew that he was right. She rubbed her hand over her temples and then over her eyes and when she pulled her hand away, she saw a smear of black and silver, from her eyeliner and eye shadow, which had begun melting off her face.

"Barely," Simon rolled his eyes and Clary narrowed her eyes as she looked up at him. He didn't say anything else though, leaving the lounge and heading through the door beside her bookshelf that lead to the kitchen. She heard him open the fridge and rummage around, and then a cupboard. She tuned him out then, slumping back into the couch and laying her head back into the cushions. She felt sleepy, like she did whenever Simon finished with her, and she felt herself falling asleep, her mind finally feeling peaceful enough for her to get some rest. "Clary?" Simon was back at her side, gently shaking her shoulder and she opened her eyes. He was handing her a glass of water—iced water from the fridge, based on the condensation that had already gathered on the sides of the glass. She gave him a small smile, pulling herself into a upright position again and taking the glass, drinking from it, finishing almost the whole glass in one gulp. "Something's not right," he stated.

"I know," Clary agreed.

"No, not just...Not just since _then_ ," Simon said, shaking his head and frowning, looking out the large window behind the couch, through the slim gaps in the wooden slats. "Something else. Something recent."

"I _know_ ," Clary repeated and he gave her a sharp look.

"What is it?" He asked.

"That's the part I _don't_ know," Clary drained the rest of the glass and leaned forward to put it down on the coffee table.

"Why didn't you tell me something was different?" Simon didn't look happy. And that sucked. Simon was her best friend, her closest ally, and he had this face like a puppy dog, and it was never nice to see a sad puppy dog. Clary sighed and moved to the edge of the couch, hanging her head forward, feeling her hair tumble down around her face, the roots a little damp from sweat and and she could feel some strands sticking to her forehead her cheeks, and she tugged at her shirt. She had only been wearing a bra, and it felt constricting under the shirt, and she honestly just wanted to strip down to _nothing_ and run.

But she couldn't do that here, not in the middle of the city.

That had been part of the reason that she had come here in the first place.

"Has anyone different been around? Have you smelt anyone? Have you got into a fight recently?" Simon began rattling off questions, but Clary's mind had only just quieted, and she really didn't want to get into any of this now.

She just wanted to _sleep_.

"Si..." she began and Simon pressed his lips together in a thin line. He pushed up the glasses that were perched on his nose—she teased him about those glasses tirelessly, called them his hipster glasses, _why_ did a warlock need glasses anyway?—and he rubbed a hand over the back of his neck.

"Okay," he agreed. "Okay, I'll leave it alone. But..." he glanced around her apartment, the small life that she had made for herself over the past few years, and his fingers twitched at his side. "Let me strengthen your wards before I go." Clary nodded, getting up off the couch and beginning to walk out of the room, trusting Simon in her space without her watching over him, and heading toward her bedroom. She didn't bother shutting her door as she got to the room, stripping out of her clothes, letting them puddle on the floor, not caring if Simon caught a glimpse of her because nudity was something that almost every werewolf just didn't give a shit about.

Then Clary fell onto her bed, face down on the pillow, and she was fast asleep, feeling the hum of Simon's magic around her.

* * *

When Clary woke up, it was night. It was dark outside. The blinds in her room were fully closed, so Simon must have come in. There was also a glass of water on the bedside table next to her, now room temperature as she reached out and picked it up, but Simon must have put it there before he had left. A small, appreciative smile graced her lips as she rolled over and reached out for the glass. Her mouth was dry, and she finished the whole thing before getting up. She didn't bother fully dressing, going over to drawers and taking out a pair of underwear and a silk, sleeping shirt—that she never really slept in, because she hated sleeping in many clothes—and then headed toward the kitchen. Her phone was on the bench in the kitchen, where she had dropped it when she had come home that afternoon, and she made a face when she saw the time.

Half past nine.

She had been asleep for nearly five hours.

She felt a hell of a lot better now, though.

Clary went the cupboard, opening it up and thinking about what she was going to have for dinner, when she froze.

She felt _a hell_ of a lot better.

Like...Almost _completely_ better.

That wasn't something that Simon's magic could do.

That wasn't something _anyones_ magic could do.

No one...Except _him_.

Clary's breathing quickened, she felt her chest lifting and falling rapidly, and she spun around. She looked in the direction of the front door and then toward the windows and then back toward the short hall that lead to the front door.

He couldn't be here.

This was New York and he was on the outskirts of Los Angeles.

He _wouldn't_ be here.

Clary closed her eyes, tipping her head back, clenching onto the edge of the bench behind as she tried to figure out exactly what was going.

Maybe she wasn't better. Maybe she had just gone back to however she had been before, a couple of weeks ago, when she wasn't feeling good, but she wasn't quiet as on edge as she was now. Maybe she was just back to being _half_ as bad as she had been feeling for so _fucking long_ now.

She had been...Off for a long time.

Since she was seventeen, actually.

But she had always been able to live with it. There had been things wrong with her and her life and her wolf from the time she had been born on this earth, and she had always gotten through it. She was strong and she was a fighter and had always managed to get through whatever shit life threw at her.

Thirteen months ago, though, she had taken a hit—her _wolf_ had taken a hit—that she hadn't been able to bounce back from.

That hole inside her had grown, and the shadows that had been hovering over her for so long had started spreading. Her wolf was agitated and scratching and whining and she didn't feel strong or whole. She had always known that staying here, staying in the city, staying _away_ was going to hurt, but up until thirteen months ago, when _he_ had become complete, she hadn't realized just how _much_ it was going to hurt.

She was older now, and she wasn't a scared and lonely seventeen year old, and she was comfortable and confident, she could look after herself and—

Clary's eyes flashed open and they were no longer their usual bright green colour, but a glittering beta gold.

 _He_ was here.

Clary gulped in breaths, her claws extending from her nail beds, harsh and digging into the wood of the bench, pressing tiny holes into the bench, and she shook her head, trying to get rid of the gold in her eyes. Her vision was blurred around the edges, and her wolf was rearing her head and then she felt this incredibly calming feeling stretch through her limbs, settling in her muscles, and there was this heavy slide in her mind, warm and comforting.

There was a sharp knock on the door and her head jerked, her wolf fucking howling inside her chest.

Clary knew who it was before she even opened the door.

She knew who it was before she even left her kitchen and came through to lounge and headed toward the front door.

She could feel it in her blood, she could feel it humming underneath her skin, and she took in a deep shaky breath before opening the door.

Jace Herondale was standing there, flanked by two other werewolves.

"It's time for you to come home, Clary," he told her, his voice leaving no room for argument.

 _Let me know what you guys think!_


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey, my beautiful, wonderful readers! It's early February, so as promised, here's an update! I hope you guys have had an amazing past few months, and I hope you're still interested in these stories! Just a quick heads up that I've uploaded some oneshots, and I do still have a couple to post, but I had so many requests to update my multi-chapters, so I thought I would update these before continuing with my editing, so there are some more to come!**

 **Anyway, here we go...**

Clary had a lot of things going through her mind as she went to her bedroom and opened her wardrobe. She had a couple of overnight bags hooked by their long straps next to her dresses, shirts and skirts and she unhooked one, dumping it on her bed and then looking around. She could hear the three werewolves in her lounge, in her space, and their scent filled her nose. She tried to push it all out of her mind—at least for now—and she began pulling things out of her drawers. She couldn't take much, but she could always get Simon to bring her some more things or, _hopefully_ , she would be back soon, and she could get more herself.

She didn't bother with any of her nice, work clothes or pretty, lacy dresses from the wardrobe, just taking out her leather jacket with the soft, suede material on the inside and a thick, fuzzy jumper that she had brought when her and Simon were in Paris last Christmas. She only just managed to pull the zipper closed after shoving a few pairs of jeans and shorts, a couple of sets of underwear and bras and then as many shirts as possible, and then she picked up her bag, slinging the long strap over her shoulder. She had properly gotten dressed, in a dark pair of jeans and an actual bra and then an off the shoulder shirt.

She'd had to change her shirt twice, because the first one she had pulled out had been Simon's, saturated with their mingled scents since it had been in her drawers for the past few weeks, and while that was comforting to her, she knew that it wouldn't be for Jace.

So she took it off, and found another shirt.

Clary didn't look in the mirror, because she knew that the expression on her face would be one of fear and nervousness, and she really didn't need to psyche herself out anymore than she already was. She shoved her fingers through her hair in a harried attempt to tame it from it's sleep-tousled state and then jerked it back in a ponytail, not pausing before leaving the bedroom, because if she tried to take a minute to centre herself, she would probably break the window in her room and leap out of it.

Clary knew the man who was standing in the lounge, next to Jace. It was one of his cousins, Alexander Lightwood, who was also one of his best friends. The Lightwoods were a good, solid family in the werewolf world, although not quite as strong the Herondales. He was better known as Alec, although Clary wasn't sure _she_ was allowed to call him that. His piercing blue eyes followed her as she came into the lounge, gripping the strap tightly in her hand. She didn't know the girl with the brunette, curly hair, but judging from the scars on her neck, she was a warrior. Clary respected that.

Jace walked over to her as she came into the room, his golden eyes flickering over her but his expression carefully blank. He reached out and Clary's eyes widened, worried that he was going to try and touch her. But he just hooked two fingers underneath the strap of her bag, taking it off her shoulder and resting it over his own. Clary's breathing hitched and she tried to keep steady eye contact as he stared at her.

He would look pretty if he smiled.

He was bloody gorgeous _anyway_ , but if he smiled...

Clary blinked and dropped her eyes first, dipping downward, landing on her feet, which were bare. She curled her toes downward, pressing into the carpet below.

"It smells like something dead in here," the curly haired girl said with a sniff, looking around with a frown. Clary didn't bother answering that statement, because she knew what the girl was talking about.

Raphael Santiago.

A vampire.

"We should go," Alec stated stiffly. His fingers twitched at his side, looking at the bag over Jace's shoulder, as though he wanted to take the weight and carry it. But Jace's hand rested almost protectively over the bag that was at his side and he didn't make any comment. Although, Clary did see his eyes narrow a little and flick up to her, but then he looked away again, pursing his lips together. Jace looked at Clary, an eyebrow arched, question in his eyes.

"I've got everything," Clary said quietly and he nodded. The girl and Alec headed toward the door, opening it and walking out first. Clary slipped into a pair of shoes at the door and picked up her keys from where they were on a hook by the door, and her handbag from the hallway table. Jace waited for Clary to follow after them before walking close behind her. She could feel his presence at her back, and she wanted to shiver and to curl up against him, but at the same time, she wanted to force her body to stay completely unchanged by him and run as far as she could get. She compromised with herself by stiffly locking her apartment door and putting one foot in front of the other, keeping her face pointedly facing forward. They took the elevator down to the ground floor, not seeing anyone else as they walked through the front lobby and out the front door, and there was a sleek, black car parked at the curb.

Clary barely held back her snort.

 _Of course_ they had managed to get a park right outside the apartment building.

There were never parks on the New York street, and yet they were parked right outside.

Alec went to move to the drivers seat and there was a clicking from the curly haired girl and she shot him a glare. Alec rolled his eyes and tossed the keys at her and she got in the drivers seat while Alec got in the passenger side. Jace opened up the back door and Clary felt her stomach twist at the fact they were going to be sitting right next to each other, but she got inside, sliding over the to the other side and clasping her hands together on her lap. Jace took a moment, putting her bag into the boot of the car, and then he was getting in next to her and they pulled away from the curb.

She didn't know how long she was going to be, but she was going to need to tell Simon that she was leaving. He always showed up at her place the morning after one their sessions together, just to check on her, and if she wasn't there, then he would freak out.

However, if she text him and told him that she was going to be out of town for a bit, he would blow up her phone with texts or, worse, start calling her. So she opened up her messages and tapped on the name of the second one down.

 _Raph_.

Clary paused for a moment, wondering what she was meant to say. But it wasn't as though she needed to explain herself to Raphael, and that was one of the good things about their—their _friendship_ —was that he didn't ask all that many questions, respecting her privacy. So she just tapped out a short message.

 _Can you please tell Si that I'm going out of town for a bit? I'll talk to him more later._

Jace glanced over at her as her phone vibrated, only a minute after she had sent her message, and she purposefully tipped her phone just a little to the side, toward the window, so that there was no chance of him seeing the message. Not that she thought that he was trying to spy, she knew that wasn't what he was doing, but she felt a creeping feeling of guilt on her side.

 _Of course. You okay?_

Clary was grateful for the short reply.

 _Yup. I'm fine. I'll call later, okay?_

 _Okay_ , came his reply and Clary didn't answer that one, turning her phone face down on her lap and staring out the window.

The whole car was tense, although the girl driving was admittedly the calmest.

Or maybe Jace was, she was just projecting how tense _she was_ onto him.

Jace certainly seemed calm, slouched a little in the seat, one hand stretched out along the windowsill and staring out the window, taking in the city around him. His other hand was resting on his knee, and he wasn't fidgeting or tapping his fingers, like Clary was tempted to do. She took in a deep breath, trying to squash that nervousness in her stomach and focus on the good.

The fact that the ache in her heart was gone.

The fact her wolf was no longer in distress.

The fact that she actually felt _good_ for the first time in a long time.

They got to the airport and Jace got out first, and then Alec, although the girl was still in the drivers seat. Clary was taking in a few breaths, trying to centre herself, and the girl twisted to look back at her with a questioning look. But then her door was opening, Jace giving her an expectant look with her bag slung over her shoulder and she got out. Jace looked as though he wanted to reach out for her, like he had in the apartment, but he didn't, just giving her a quick nod before they started walking into the airport.

"Maia will meet us at security," Alec stated, and that must have been the name of the girl who was driving the car. Jace nodded again, letting Alec lead the way, keeping his strides shorter than normal to match Clary's. Clary shoved one hand into the back pocket of her jeans while the other gripped her phone, and she glanced up at the flashing boards announcing the flights as they walked through the terminal.

Clary was sort of...In a daze as Alec handed over their tickets and then they moved on to security. Not in a bad way, not in the way that she had been feeling for the past year, but because her wolf and her body were still catching up with the fact that he was there. It was a soothing feeling that, just him being close, and it was spreading through her limbs, relaxing her completely.

She wanted to sleep.

For a really, _really_ long time now, she just hadn't been calm enough to have a deep, proper sleep. When she slept, her dreams were haunted and her body just twisted and turned. She hadn't felt rested in so long, and with him being there...Her body and mind trusted him and they were finally telling her that she could switch off and rest.

Jace kept glancing down at her as they made their way to security, Maia Roberts running to catch up with them, obviously having dropped off the car, and Clary knew that Jace could sense her drowsiness.

Part of her _wanted_ him to reach out and steady her, put his hand on her back of her neck, or wrap his fingers around her wrist, but she was grateful that he didn't. That he respected the need for distance. That he knew the difference between what she wanted and what she needed. That he moved close enough to her that she could feel his soothing comfort, yet far enough away that she didn't feel overwhelmed.

After they went through security, they headed toward the loading bay. It turned out the flight that they were getting on was leaving damn soon, it seemed as though they had come and gotten her with just a few minutes to spare. Maia was happy, and her and Alec obviously had a good relationship, because even though he was trying to keep his face stoic, Maia teased him and jabbed him in the side with her finger, and Clary could smell the familiar, happy, comforting smells coming off both of them. They were pack and they were better when they were together.

Jace liked what he saw when he watched them as well, it was obvious that he was proud of his pack mates.

Clary liked that he was happy.

A lot of the time he wasn't, and she knew that she was a huge part of that.

They loaded onto the plane, which wasn't too full, which was good. They were seated near the back, two seats in one row and then two the row behind it, obviously the tickets brought at the last minute so unable to all be together. Maia and Alec moved to take the seats in the front, a little squabble breaking out over who got the window seat. Clary couldn't hold back her smile, and she bit down on her lower lip to try and suppress it. Jace just had a long-suffering expression on his face as he stored Clary's bag in the overhead and indicated that she take the window seat in their row. She gave him a small smile and shuffled in, making herself comfortable.

Jace moved in to sit next to her.

Clary took in a deep breath, her chest rising and falling, and she wondered if she should say something.

 _Anything_.

But then the flight attendants were all big smiles even though Clary could blatantly smell the annoyance and tiredness flowing off as they walked down the aisles to check their seatbelts and begin to go through the safety instructions. So she stayed quiet, wiggling a little in her seat to make herself comfortable, pulling down the cover of the window beside her.

The engine began whirring and then the plane began moving.

Clary's eyes were drooping as Jace moved his arm, resting it against her on the arm rest between them. She felt that pressure of his arm against hers like a wave flowing over her body, a warm, calming wave. Their arms were touching from the elbow right down to her pinky finger, and the heaviness in her mind just became more and more.

She fell asleep quickly, the fastest and deepest she had slept in a long time.

 **Right! So, here's the super, super long A/N—sorry! I had a great Christmas and New Years time, not really doing much, just spending time at the beach and with my husband and with some of best friends. This year has started well, there's been a few bad days, but hey, happens to everyone. I hope your year has started just as good, and you spent it with family and friends if that's what you prefer, and that you spent it alone and quiet if that's what you prefer.**

 **I wanted to say that I managed to get around to most of peoples oneshots, at least the ones that struck a chord with me because some of prompts just aren't the type that I can write, and I had fun with the ones I wrote! You can still send me prompts or requests through the year, and I try and get to them near the end of the year when I focus on oneshots. Can be in a huge variety of fandoms, just ask me :)**

 **On with the recommendations!**

 **TV Shows: _Roswell: New Mexico_. Well. I loooved the original series, even if I can see a lot of flaws in it when watching it now back to when I was a teenager. I'm enjoying the reboot so far, I really like the change up in Liz, and Michael's relationship with Alex. I love that Tyler Blackburn from Pretty Little Liars is in it, and Michael Trevino from Vampire Diaries, because he was one of my favourite characters from VD. Anyway. Fingers crossed it goes well. And I intensely ship Max/Liz already, and not because I know they're supposed to get together, but because I love their chemistry, which is more than the original series, at least for my side. Oh and _The Runaways_ Season 2! I liked Gert a lot more in this one. Ooh, and _Sex Education_. That show is absolutely brilliant. Like, insanely brilliant. I'm so glad it's been renewed for another season. I also started watching _The Following_ for the hundredth time because this show is amazing.**

 **Music: _6 Figures_ by Kings, _Run Away With Me_ by Carly Rae Jepsen, _Old News_ by Mitch James, _Wasted_ by Jesse McCartney and _Bad_! by XXXTENTACION. Ooh, and _Saturday Nights_ by Khalid, _Bury A Friend_ by Billie Eilish and _Wild Enough_ by Elina.**

 **Movies: _Tomb Raider_ , which I watched for the second time the other week and I quite enjoyed it, a lot more than the first time I watched it. Alicia Vikander is a babe. Also _How To Train Your Dragon 3_. Holy shit. I knew this one was going to get me in the feels, but I didn't expect to cry twice. It was beautiful. Also the new _Robin Hood._ Maybe I'm biased because I love Taron Egerton, but I didn't think it was anywhere near as bad as what the reviews said. I know it wasn't great, but I still enjoyed it, and Marian was a badass.**

 **Now, I've got some questions! Thought I'd change things up a little this year.**

 **So; what is your favourite song right now? Mine would be a tie between _Run Away With Me_ by Carley Rae Jepsen and _Back To Life_ by Hailee Steinfield.**

 **What is...Your favourite movie that you've seen recently? Mine would be _Spiderman: Into The Spiderverse_.**

 **Aaaand what is your favourite fandom to read in? For me it would be a tie between the DC fandom and _Harry Potter_ right now, although it changes frequently.**

 **Talk to me, let me know what you thought and answer the questions if you feel inclined to!**


	3. Chapter 3

When Clary's eyes opened, Jace was giving her a soft look. She blinked at him, yawning and lifting a hand to rub it over her face.

"Not been sleeping, huh?" Jace asked quietly, a concerned look on his face, and Clary sighed. There really wasn't much point in disagreeing with that, because these past five and a half hours was the most sound sleep that she had had in over a year. Jace just gave her a gentle smile before resting back in his own seat, looking toward the front of the plane. They were on their downward descent, and Clary felt her stomach twist into knots.

They were going to be back in Los Angeles.

They _were_ in Los Angeles.

She hadn't been back in two years, and even when she had gone back then, she had only been there for three days, and she had flown into one of the smaller airports of a city nearby and then _driven_ to her destination. Pretty much anything to avoid not getting in contact with Jace.

When they landed, they all filed off the plane, Jace taking her bag out of the overhead and walking behind her, close enough that she could feel the heat coming off him, but far enough back that she wasn't crowded by him—and also not crowded by anyone else, which she was thankful for. They went through the security check points and were then making their way through the terminal. Alec and Maia were leading the way toward some pay machines for parking, and Clary couldn't help but think about what was happening next.

Were they going back to Jace's place?

She wasn't prepared for that.

Her heartbeat had obviously picked up, due to her nervousness, because Jace gave her a look and she tried to slow it down, breathing in and out slowly. Jace didn't say anything, although Alec looks back at her before he fishes his wallet out of his back pocket and takes out a parking ticket. He puts it into the machine and then puts in his credit card, and then steps aside for Jace to do the same thing, so obviously they had brought two cars.

She tries not to think about what that means.

As they're heading toward the lifts, Clary checks one of the clocks on the wall and saw that it was just after eleven o'clock and she winced.

Time differences were a bitch.

The four of them all got out on the same floor, but then Alec and Maia paused.

"I'll see you later," Jace told them both pointedly, before beginning to walk towards steps that lead up to another level. Clary glanced at them both, noting the way Alec's eyes were narrowed and Maia's eyes were a little concerned, but then she turned away to follow after Jace, who was gripping her bag tightly and walking with long strides. Clary jogged a little to catch up with him, and after climbing the stairs, his car was parked only a few spots over. It was a sleek car, a shining black Camaro, and Clary paused as he unlocked it with the fob that he pulled out of his pocket and then popped the boot, putting her bag inside. Then he moved around to the drivers side, giving her a pointed look and so she moved to the passenger side.

And then they were alone.

In an enclosed space.

Clary took in a deep breath as she closed the door and pulled on the seat belt, even though it was all just for show. She smoothed her hands over her her thighs and leaned back into the leather of the seats and took in another deep breath.

Which was a bad idea.

Because all she got on the inhale was a strong scent of _Jace_ , and it made her feel a lot dizzy.

She must have let out a noise, because Jace glanced over at her with a quirk of his eyebrow, before he turned the key in the ignition and the Camaro started. It purred, and the car was obviously well looked after, and Clary rolled her shoulders backward and fixed her eyes forward as they reversed out of the parking spot and then drove toward the concrete ramps that lead down and out of the parking complex.

At first, Clary wasn't sure where they were going.

She leaned forward in her seat and was looking around, having been away from Los Angeles for a long time.

The streets all felt the same, and it was similar to New York, in the fact that it was still alive in the middle of the night, but it just didn't feel as harried and rushed as her home for the past few years had been. She smiled a little to herself, feeling a bit sad, before leaning back in her seat.

She felt tired again.

She had napped at home, after Simon had helped her, but that had been a sleep out of necessity.

This was different.

Now, Clary's body felt relaxed and safe, and it was because of Jace.

His scent and his wolf soothed her—soothed _her_ wolf.

Clary tried to focus on the music that was playing softly. She didn't recognize the artist, it was a girl with a pretty, lilting voice. She listened to the lyrics, paying close attention to them not because it was a particularly amazing song, but because it gave her something to do rather than think about the fact that Jace was sitting just a few inches away from her.

He smelt _so good_.

"Where are we going?" Clary asked after about twenty minutes of quiet in the car.

"I'm taking you to Luke's," Jace replied, and instantly, he could smell her relief flooding through the car. She tried to suppress it, he knew that she didn't want him feeling _bad_ about the fact that she was happy he wasn't taking her back to his place, but she couldn't.

She'd have a hard time hiding it from any werewolf, but _especially_ from Jace.

She really didn't stand a chance.

"Thank you," Clary murmured and Jace turned his head partially toward her, a small smile on his face in response. It wasn't a particularly happy smile, which she could understand, because he had just flown across the country to get her, and now he was about to drop her off and leave her again, but at least she would be a whole lot closer.

They were quiet for a long time, and Clary actually ended up falling asleep. It was somewhere just out of the city, as they got onto the highway. It was a peaceful sleep, something so completely different to the times that she had slept in the past couple of years. It wasn't until she heard her name being repeated, softly but over and over again, that she woke up and she blinked rapidly a few times, surprised at how heavy her mind and body felt.

Heavy because of how comfortable she felt, not on edge or jerking out of sleep like usual.

"Hey," Jace said quietly, keeping his voice low, letting her wake up slowly. Clary yawned, rubbing a hand over her face, and then looked out the window. They were parked up outside a house...A house she had only been to a couple of times, and one of the last times she had been there, she had been covered in blood and she had slashes ripping down her arm from her father. "Hey," Jace repeated, although this time, the word sounded a bit different. Concerned.

He could smell the change in her mood as easily as he could sense his own.

"It's alright," Jace continued. "I don't—I can take you somewhere else. We can get you a hotel room or something, it's just—" he broke off, but Clary knew what he was getting at. He wanted her to be somewhere comfortable, somewhere familiar, and going to a hotel wasn't the best idea, given there were very few places that were cleaned well enough that they didn't have that cloying scent of all the people before them. It was _her_ turn to smell the shift in him, feel it crawl over her skin.

He was nervous and he was upset that _she_ was upset.

"It's okay," Clary reassured him, and part of her instinctively wanted to reach out and touch his arm or his knee, but she stopped herself. She had gotten better over the years, actually listening to her instincts rather than smothering them down like she had ever since she was a pup, but she still wasn't going to let herself be completely open with Jace.

Or any kind of open, really.

"I'll be okay," Clary said as she unbuckled her seat belt and let it slip back into it's place against the door. "And if I'm not, I've got other places I can go." She didn't really know if she did, actually, given how long she had been away from this place, but she didn't want to worry Jace with that.

"If you're not, then call me, okay?" Jace told her earnestly and Clary nodded, because she didn't really have any other response. He glanced back toward the house and then reached for the handle of his door. "I text Luke and told him that we would be coming, and he would have heard us pull up." Clary knew that Luke would have heard them pull up, but she hadn't realized that Jace would have text ahead. She didn't know that they were close enough to have each others phone numbers, Luke had never mentioned it to her.

Although, she could understand why.

"I didn't want you to feel as though you couldn't talk to him," Jace said softly, being able to figure out what it was that Clary was thinking pretty much spot on. He wasn't a mind reader, fortunately there were only a couple of warlocks and vampires out there who could do that, werewolves weren't part of the gifted.

He could just sense every chemosignal coming off her and read every micro-expression on her face.

"It's okay," Clary muttered, pushing open her door and getting out of the car. It had to be around one in the morning by now, she would have to change the time on her phone to Los Angeles time. She stretched her arms above her head and took in a deep breath of the clean, fresh air around her. There was a slight salty tinge to the air as well, coming up from the ocean that was only a few miles away.

It smelt like home, but it didn't _feel_ like home, and the way her body and her mind and her wolf were all disconnected made her itch all over.

Jace walked around the back of the car and opened up the boot, taking out her bag and slipping it over his shoulder, obviously intent on carrying it into the house. Clary didn't bother arguing with him because she knew it was pointless. Not that she wasn't stubborn, but she knew how to pick her battles, and carrying a bag wasn't one of them. As he shut the boot, he held out his hand.

"Your phone," he said softly when Clary gave him a questioning look. She pulled it out of her back pocket, unlocking it with her a couple of taps on the glass since it was too dark to pick up her face. She handed it over to him and he keyed a few things in and a moment later, she heard a low buzz, and she was guessing that he had sent a text from her phone to his, so that he would have her number. "My numbers in there," he told her as he handed it back. "If you need anything, call me," he paused and his lips twisted together, in a sort of resigned look. "Or...Text me. If that's easier."

She appreciated that.

She appreciated _all_ of this.

She knew how lucky she was.

She just...Wasn't any good at putting that into words and actions.

Primarily with Jace.

"Okay. I will," Clary answered and Jace raised an eyebrow at her. It had come out easily, even though she knew she wouldn't do it, and he obviously heard the skip in her heart beat, a sure tell that she was lying. He didn't move from where he was standing beside his car, even as she took a step around him, in the direction of the house. She sighed, taking in a full body breath and feeling the air flow through her, into her limbs and twitching her fingers. "I will," she repeated, and meant it this time.

Her heart beat was steady, and Jace heard that, and he gave her a small smile, almost a real one this time.

They both began walking toward the steps that lead up to the house, and as though he knew it was time, Luke Greymark opened the front door of the house. He was wearing a soft pair of plaid pyjama pants and a loose singlet, but his face was completely alert, eyes sharp as he looked over the two werewolves in front of him.

"Alpha Herondale," Luke nodded his head in a slow nod, before letting his eyes glow at Jace.

"Alpha Greymark," Jace responded formally, with a nod of his own, his red eyes burning. They both faded back to their human eye colour and Clary felt a shiver go through her as she looked up at Luke. He gave her a warm smile, his whole body giving off a comforting that had her nearly tripping up the stairs to get close to him.

"Hey, pup," Luke murmured against her hair as he pulled her in tight against him. Clary's whole body went calm, although that wasn't say anything against Jace, it was just because her mind actually let herself relax when it came to Luke. Her wolf was completely happy when it came to Jace, it was just her human half that held back, that was trying to protect herself. Clary threw herself at Luke and felt herself mold into his body as his arms came around him, holding her in tight. She wasn't sure how long she let herself lean against him, but it had been far too long since she had seen him. When they finally pulled back, Luke leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head.

Clary caught a scent off Jace in the breeze.

Sadness.

And that made her wolf churn in her gut, and she pulled back from Luke to look back over at Jace.

He was keeping a neutral expression on his face, even though both other werewolves could smell the sadness that was swirling around him. Clary took in deep breath through her mouth, rather than through her nose, and she stepped down the top step, closer to Jace. Luke moved behind her, and she felt his hand touch her shoulder before he went back inside, leaving the door slightly ajar for when Clary was ready to come in.

"Thank you," Clary said quietly. To be fair, it wasn't as though Jace had given her much of a choice, but she knew why he had come.

He would have been feeling that same trouble, that same danger, that some feeling that something was wrong that she had been feeling. He would have felt it strongly, and he acted in this way to make sure that she was safe. Part of her should be angry that he gave her no choice but to fly all the way back here, completely disrupting her life, but she could hold that out for later.

Right now, she was just enjoying the fact that she didn't feel sick for the first time in a long time.

She felt _safe_.

"You'll be pissed later," Jace responded in a voice that sounded so knowing and familiar, even though they _weren't_ familiar with each other. But Clary couldn't help but smile a little, at the fact that he seemed to know her, even though they had barely ever spent any time together.

"Yeah, I will be," Clary shrugged a shoulder. "But I know why you did it." Jace gave her a soft look. She ran her fingers through her hair, which was feeling a little matted, from her sleep back in her apartment, then her sleep again on the plane, and then her sleep _again_ in the car, and she really needed a shower and to brush her hair. Jace looked away, toward the forestry that surrounded the huge house that Luke now owned.

Just a few kilometers away had been the house that she had grown up in.

Or, at least, it had been there.

Before Clary had lit the match and watched it go up in flames.

Her mother and brother had understood.

Hell, her brother had been the one with gasoline in his hand, dosing the places before the threw the match.

It wasn't as though it had ever been an _actual_ pack home, so it wasn't a place that Clary missed, or anyone who had been in the Morgenstern, now Greymark, pack.

She just wished she could burn it down all over again.

"Trees have grown there," Jace mentioned idly. "And grass." Clary pursed her lips together and dropped her head. She hadn't been in that direction since she had initially burnt it down, which was just over six years ago. "It smells a lot better..." he murmured and Clary nodded at him, shoving a hand into the front pocket of her jeans.

"It couldn't really smell any worse," she stated. Jace nodded slowly, but he didn't say anything else. After a few more moments, he slipped the strap of her bag off his shoulder and handed it up to her, stepping up one of the three steps to pass it to her. Clary took it, two steps above him, but only about an inch taller. Jace stepped up again, and Clary's jaw clenched for a moment, wondering what he was going to do. He hesitated, but then he lifted his hand to wrap it around her neck, not in a hold that she couldn't break, but still firmly, his palm pressed to the side of her throat.

Clary's eyes nearly rolled back into her head at the pleasure and safety that suddenly rushed over her, just at the simple touch.

Her breathing came out in short gasps and she felt her whole body melting under the touch.

Jace pulled away a moment later, and gave her the a first proper, genuine smile.

It warmed her wolf.

"I'll see you soon, Clary," his voice was gentle as he stepped away, walking backwards down the steps and to his car. It was only once he got to the door that he broke eye contact and turned away.

Clary watched him—her _mate_ —drive away, chewing down on her lower lip.

 **I've written this about four times now, and I'm just going to keep it simple.**

 **On the 15th of March 2019, there was a terrorist attack in my beautiful country, New Zealand. This is the first ever mass shooting on this level during peace time in the beautiful islands that I have spent my whole life in.**

 **This doesn't happen here. We don't have mass shootings. We don't have a fear of one another to the point where it drums up anger that turns to hate.** **In the words of our absolutely incredible Prime Minister, " _They are us_."**

 **We are all one people, and we can't let hate win.**

 **I hope you all spend time with people that you love and cherish, and I hope you never hold back to show this.**

 **Arohanui and Kia Kaha x**


	4. Chapter 4

Jace didn't drive straight home.

Or, he did drive back to his _property_ , but instead of carrying up the main driveway, he turned down one of the side driveways, one that lead toward an old barn house that he had been renovating in the past couple of months. It had been there for years, although as long as his mother had been living on the property, it had never been used, and had just been left to rot away. When Jace was younger, he used to play there with some of the other pups, and then in the past year, he had found himself straying there more and more.

If he was being honest, it would be nice to have a little place away from the main house.

Not all of his pack lived there, but a majority of them did.

And there were certain members of his pack who had a lot of difficulty when it came to personal space. Not that there _was_ much when it came to a wolf pack, but Jace sometimes liked to have somewhere of his own, that was quiet, let him think.

It was still dark, just after two in the morning, but there was a clearing of trees where the barn house was, and when Jace got out of his car and looked up at the sky, he could see the stars winking down at him and he could see the moon shining brightly, catching the tops of the trees that circled the clearing. Jace paused before slipping out of his jacket and tossing it back into his car, taking in a deep breath and inhaling the warm scent of Clary. His eyes fluttered closed for a moment before he straightened up and slammed the door of the car shut.

Years.

It had been _years_ since he had seen Clary.

Not quite as long since he had heard from her, because she had called him just before Christmas last year. The conversation had been completely formal, and stiff, asking for his permission to come into the city to see Luke and her family. Jace hated that they were so distant and awkward with each other, when she was asking question to the local Alpha to come into the city was just meant to be something by unrelated werewolves, ones without any link to the pack. Jace knew for a fact that Clary usually flew into San Diego, which was closer to Del Mar. Jace may only be an Alpha in the Los Angeles district, but he had the strongest pack, so he had the most alliances, and so he would generally catch wind of a werewolf passing through, as a respectful heads up.

Luke also told him.

Because Luke wanted things to work out between Jace and Clary.

He never blatantly _said that_ , but Jace could tell.

And he was grateful for it.

He knew that he was up against a lot when it came to Clary, and so he was glad that at least someone who had his ear could vouch for the fact he was a good guy who only wanted what was best for.

Actually, he was pretty sure that she knew.

At least, her _wolf_ knew.

It was the person who was having a hard time coming to terms with it.

Jace would never _say_ that to Clary though, that was up to her.

It had been nearly six years, and he was really hoping it was going to happen soon.

Because it was getting harder and harder to operate without his mate at his side.

Jace ran.

He ran for a long time, until the sun was coming up. Then he got back to his car, his thighs burning and streaks of mud and blood on his arms, and he fell asleep in the uncomfortable front seat of his car.

* * *

"Sooooo..." Isabelle wiggled her eyebrows the minute Jace walked through the door. The smug smirk on her face dropped as she took Jace in, obviously not finding what she was looking for as she looked him over. And smelt him. She pursed her lips together and made a face, pulling her fingers through her hair and tossing it over her shoulder. "I was hoping that you didn't come back last night with Maia and Alec because you and Clarissa were getting it on." Jace just arched an eyebrow at her, not responding, as he walked over to the cupboard and took out a glass, and then went to the fridge and leaned the glass against the side where the water filter was.

"Nope," Jace shook his head and sipped from the glass once it was full. Isabelle made a face and sighed.

"Clearly," she muttered. "You smell all...Sweaty. And not in the good, sex way." Jace didn't answer as he finished the rest of the ice water off. Isabelle didn't say anything else as she came over to him and snuggled up against him. She rubbed her cheek against his chest, her arms tight around his waist, just trying to comfort him. Jace didn't respond for a moment, but then he put down his glass and wrapped one arm around her and the other came up to rest on the back of her neck, rubbing it lightly, scenting her.

Jace went upstairs and showered, coming downstairs just as Will Herondale was plucking bacon off Maia's place. Maia snapped her teeth at him and narrowed her eyes. Will just smiled at her and patted her curls, dancing backwards quickly to avoid her hand as she reached out to slap him.

"Nephew," Will smirked at him, and Jace just rolled his eyes before walking into the kitchen.

"Stop bugging my pack," Jace muttered as he looked into the pan where Alec was frying more bacon.

"I _am_ your pack!" Will said indignantly, although that smirk was still fixed on his face. Jace didn't respond to that, because Will could stand up for himself. Not that Maia _couldn't_ , but Will made a point of getting on the nerves of pretty much everyone. Alec emptied the panful of bacon onto the plate, and then began to put more into the pan. Jace lifted his head to look out the window as he heard a car coming up the driveway, and a few moments later, it appeared through the trees and Jace's eyebrows pulled together as he pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the time.

"What's he doing here?" Jace muttered under his breath. "He should be on his way to school." Isabelle turned around in her seat at the kitchen table to look through the window and grinned as she saw her little brother get out of the car, not even bothering to shut the drivers side door properly, before jogging up to the house.

"Alec! Jace!" Max Lightwood announced loudly as he pulled open the door. He practically threw himself against his older brother and his Alpha, arms tight around their shoulders. In the past couple of months—probably more over the past year—he had really shot up in height, and he wasn't much shorter than Jace now. He still had a few inches to go before he caught up with Alec though.

"What are you doing here, Max?" Jace asked with a raise of his eyebrow. "You should be on your way to school?"

"I..." Max trailed off before fixing Jace with a charming smile. "I came for breakfast?" It was posed as a question and wasn't entirely untrue, so there was no skip in his heartbeat. But Jace knew that it also wasn't the full truth. Jace just stared at him until Max's smile grew and he wiggled his shoulders a bit. "I came to see if _she_ was here." Alec stiffened where he was frying the bacon, and he pursed his lips together as he flipped the bacon over in jerky movements. Jace glanced at Alec before he slipped an arm around Max's shoulders and tugged him away.

"We'll get you some breakfast, and then you're off to school, okay?" Jace said, his tone friendly but still stern. Max sighed and made a face but nodded, and he moved over to take a seat beside Alec. Will had begun walking toward the side door, and Jace followed after him, shutting the door behind him and leaning his head against the wooden side of the house. Will was quiet for all of two seconds, before he moved to stand opposite Jace, leaning against the wooden railing that ran around the balcony.

"How did it go?" Will asked. Jace didn't reply for a long few beats, and Will cleared his throat pointedly, until Jace tipped his head forward, away from the wall, and looked at his uncle. " _Jace_..."

"Well, she's not here, is she? So it can't have gone _that_ great," Jace stated, waving a hand toward the kitchen where some of his pack were eating breakfast.

"But that was never really part of the plan, was it?" Will prompted with a knowing look. "You didn't actually think that you would just show up at her door, take her away from her life, and she would just fall down at your feet and give her her neck?" There was a mocking tone to Will's voice that had Jace glaring, but he knew his uncle was right. Will's nose twitched, and he could obviously smell the upset that was coming off Jace, and he twisted his lips together. He leaned forward and put a hand on Jace's shoulder, thumb pressing firmly into the muscle. "She came back with you. That's saying something." He gave his shoulder a last squeeze before he was heading back into the house.

Will could be frustrating.

He could smug and self-assured, and he acted as though he had knowledge so far beyond Jace's years, even there was only ten years between himself and Jace.

He was the _much_ younger brother of Jace's father.

He also thought that the Alpha spark was going to be passed onto him, and so there had definitely been tension when Jace was a teenager and Stephen Herondale had begun training Jace to take on the responsibilities and power of an Alpha. But it had waned over the years, and they had settled into a reasonably steady relationship, mainly where Will acted as though he wasn't going to respect Jace's decisions as Alpha, as though he had free range, but generally he did, and he even offered helpful advice from time to time.

And Will had been right in what he said.

Clary could have stayed in New York.

Jace would never have _forced_ her to come back with him, and she knew that.

At least, he really _hoped_ she knew that.

He and Clary had a bumpy start to their relationship.

Actually, that was putting it mildly.

Jace had been accompanying his father out to Del Mar to see an Alpha who had attacked several witches who had been minding their own business and had had permission from Stephen to pass through the territory. Jace didn't know the details of what had happened, Stephen had just gotten a phone call and collected Jace and said that they were needed. His father had been worried on the way, Jace could smell it on his Alpha as they drove from their place and to the other township.

The witches hadn't been from just _any_ coven.

They were from the Idris coven, one of the most powerful in the world, and Valentine Morgenstern had decided to take them on.

It wasn't until a few hours later that they had realized what had happened.

Valentine's wife, Jocelyn Morgenstern, had gone to the witches when she found out they were passing by, because she wanted their help. Whether that help was to kill Valentine, or just to help her get away with her family, Jace wasn't sure, but either way, Valentine had found out, and he had lashed out, both at the witches themselves, and also at his family.

It hadn't been until _years_ later that Jace knew more of the story.

Valentine and Jocelyn had been married for years, but when Valentine's old friend, Luke Greymark, had come to Del Mar, seeking refuge and somewhere to stay, things shifted. Valentine had been a powerful werewolf, even for such a small pack, but he was angry. He was angry and he kept his pack secluded from others, which was such a strange thing because werewolves were tactile and loving and they liked being around other people, other werewolves. He was jealous and possessive, and not in the way werewolves usually were, more aggressive and vicious. When he saw Jocelyn and Luke becoming close, it seemed to trigger something inside, and he became even more violent than he had been before, toward his small pack and anyone who threatened the strength that he had.

As the Alpha werewolf of the entire California area, Stephen knew Valentine and had been the one to give him permission to live on the land, as he had to several other werewolf packs, but he had only met him a couple of times.

Jace knew that Stephen had regretted not being aware of what had happened with the Morgenstern pack. Because they had all kept to themselves so much, no one had really realized what had happened, so there was no one to report it, but Stephen still blamed himself, because a good Alpha took responsibility for things that went wrong in their territory, whether it was their fault or not.

Jace had killed Clary's father.

The first time he had ever met his mate, he had killed her father.

He and Stephen had gone to the coven, where only two witches were still waiting for them. The coven had only been small, because of how old it was, there were only eleven of them in total, and three had been slaughtered, caught completely off guard by their enemy, and apart from the two that remained behind to prepare the bodies to be transported to be buried, the others were back in Idris. The witches were enraged and preparing their own revenge, and it was only when Jace caught a scent that had made his skin burn and his eyes flare that they had backed down, realizing that there was something more there.

Stephen had recognized the scent, he knew that it was Valentines, and he had driven them to the Morgenstern homestead. Something had felt wrong, the whole way there, and Jace couldn't shake this strange feeling that had settled over him and put him on edge. The minute they pulled up outside the house and got out of the car, Jace got his first full inhale of the scent that had been driving him crazy, and he realized what it was.

His mate.

His mate was _here_.

Jace had been growling and his eyes glowing and Stephen gave him a surprised look but had let him lead the way, allowing Jace to take charge. They heard shouting and screaming and then there was a sickly sound of flesh ripping and bones breaking, and when they had gotten around the back of the house, they had seen Valentine throwing a red head toward a tree, her petite body slamming against the solid trunk and a sickening crunch sounding out.

Jace barely took stock of the situation before he had flown into action, instinct driving him forward.

 _Now_ Jace knew that the red head had been Valentines daughter, _Clary_.

 _Now_ Jace knew that Clary had lashed out to protect her mother.

 _Now_ Jace knew that Valentine had been ready to _kill_ Jocelyn for going to the witches for help.

 _Now_ Jace knew that Valentine had been abusing his family for years, to the point where one of the few pack members had actually died.

Jace hadn't known that when he had ripped Valentines throat out with his teeth.

All Jace had known was that this man had been hurting his mate.

And so he had killed him.

 **I don't really have the energy for a paragraph thing sorry. I've been fucking spiraling for the past six weeks or so, although I guess I had my birthday? Which was okay?**

 **Um... _Nightmare_ by Halsey is a fucking anthem and I don't know how many times I've listened and cried to it in the past day and half it's been out.**

 **Hope you enjoyed the update.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Merp, I've kinda lost track of my updating schedule? *Throws updates and internet cookies***

Clary only managed to get a few hours of sleep.

In fact, she was pretty sure she didn't actually get any sleep, just kind of closed her eyes and tried not to think about _everything_ that had happened in the past few hours, and she would feel as though _maybe_ she was drifting into unconsciousness, but then her eyes would open of their own accord and she would be wide awake again.

She was in her old room and it felt strange to be back here without any particular reason. And while it was her old room, it wasn't the room that she had grown up in. It was the room that she had been in since she was seventeen, and she had only been in for just over a year, and then when she had come back for visits, which really hadn't been often. It had a lot of her stuff from her bedroom growing up, a lot of the pictures in childish photo frames, books and magazines in the book shelf and her desk organized with her old laptop and pencils and a few writing books. There were still a lot of old clothes in her drawers and wardrobe, and it was lucky that Clary really hadn't grown all that much since she was eighteen—she had always been petite and with werewolf metabolism, it wasn't as though she had ever really put on much weight, just shifting a few pounds here and there.

It was the sun was only just rising outside when Clary got up, moving quietly around the room and over to her drawers. She opened the middle drawer and there were some jeans and shorts and leggings inside. She found a pair of grey and purple leggings and pulled them on, noting that they were a bit tighter around her ass than they would have been a while ago. She didn't know if she was happy or pissed about that, turning on her side to look at her shadowy figure in the mirror and tipped her head to the side as she looked at the curve of her ass. It _did_ look a little bigger than it did a few months ago. Her attention shifted as she fished a sports bra out of her bag and tugged a shirt on and then slipped her phone into the slim pocket against her thigh. She had only packed one other pair of shoes when she had been coming here from here apartment, but there were a pair of running shoes in her wardrobe, so she pulled them on and walked out of her room.

She was glad she was on the first floor, because there was a good chance that she would wake people up if she was on the second floor. Although Luke had mentioned that he was getting the walls reinforced with sound proofing, something that was pretty much a _requirement_ when being a werewolf, given how acute their hearing was.

Clary closed the front door behind her, taking in a deep breath of the crisp, morning air that smelt absolutely _nothing_ like New York. She was hit with so many memories as certain smells twined together, reminding her of growing up, and she shook her head, jerking her hair back roughly in a ponytail before jumping down the couple of stairs leading up to the deck, and was then running.

Her wolf was happy.

She was preening and jumping and running around inside Clary, stretching out through her limbs and pushing her to run faster, faster.

Clary ran in the city, of course, but she couldn't run like she did here. She couldn't open herself up and let herself be free, and holding herself back had actually become so second-nature to her, that she actually had to force herself to remember that she could _let_ go. The toes of her shoes dug deeper into the ground, pushing herself to go faster and actually feeling the muscles of her body straining a little as she ducked and weaved and then all of a sudden she was skidding to such a fast stop that her body seized up a bit and then she was crashing to the ground and rolling over and she could feel branches and stones tugging and scratching at her, but none of the pain lasted very long, all of them healing quickly when she finally stopped rolling and stared up at the sky through the leafy branches above her.

Her breathing slowed down and she squeezed her eyes shut.

There were certain smells that were never going away.

There were certain memories that were never going away.

Clary turned her head to the side and the clearing that she had grown up in was right in front of her.

Jace had been right, the whole place looked so much different from how it used to, and it smelt a whole lot different as well—it smelt _better_ , because it could never smell any worse, although there were still familiar scents still wound into the very fabric of this place.

Clary swallowed hard as she lifted herself up so that she was sitting, legs spread out in front of her, dirt and thin slivers of blood scattered over her arms from the cuts that were already healed, and she let her eyes travel around. The place where the old house had been was now a clearing, and it was filled with little bushes and trees that were a lot newer than the ones around it, but that had taken root and were beginning to grow and climb.

Because of how much newer these trees were, it was obvious that this was a young part of the forest, but someone who walked by would never have guessed the horrors that went on here.

The person that had nearly killed Clary, and her mother, and her brother.

And the other person who _had_ killed her father.

Clary wasn't sure how she was meant to react, being back in this place after six years of refusing to set foot in it, had refused to be in the same part of the _country_ as it most of the time. She didn't feel sad—she had long ago stopped feeling—and she didn't feel angry, because the anger that she had felt in the years that had followed that fateful afternoon had been nearly enough to consume her, and she refused to let herself feel that way again.

She felt...Resigned, she guessed.

Maybe she wished that she felt a little more relieved and _happy_ that this whole place was gone and it was never going to inflict any more pain on her again, but she didn't, because even all these years later, she was still feeling all the wounds that this place had inflicted on her. She still had scars on her body that even werewolf healing hadn't been able to fix, not from the silver and the wolfsbane whips and lashes that she had received. The physical scars weren't the ones that affected her everyday, though.

It was the emotional ones that ran a lot deeper, and that stopped her from being able to trust someone with her wolf and with her heart, even her own mate.

Clary took in a deep breath through her nose and still caught hints of ash and soot that was buried deep in the dirt underneath her feet. She let her eyes open and glow gold as she stared back up at the sky, which was beginning to turn blue, and then the silence was broken by her phone ringing and vibrating against her leg. Clary let her eyes shift quickly back to their human bright green and reached into the pocket to pull out her phone.

 _Raph_.

Clary didn't think twice before swiping her thumb across the screen to answer the call, lifting it up to her ear.

"Hey," she answered, feeling her body relax.

"Hey," Raphael answered, his voice smooth and calm. "I wanted to give you a call to make sure everything was alright before I went to sleep." Clary pulled her phone away from her ear and saw that it was almost half past six. She did the math in her head and wrinkled her nose as she brought her phone back to her ear.

"Shit, it's after nine back home," she told him. "You should be asleep."

"Not before I talked to you," Raphael continued. "Is everything okay?" Clary let out a long breath, rolling her shoulders and her neck, letting her body loosen up.

"I'm going to be," Clary responded.

"Is this to do with everything that's been going on with you for the past few months? Because there's been so much magic around you recently...I know that you're needing Simon's help just to get through the day," Raphael said and Clary winced because it was true. Raphael had only mentioned it once or twice, even though it was glaringly obvious to anyone supernatural, but especially to a vampire who had over a hundred years of experience who had known her for nearly two years and had seen the way she had gone downhill.

"Yeah, I guess it is," Clary didn't really get into it, even though she knew that Raphael deserved a better explanation that what she was giving him. It wasn't as though he didn't know about Jace, and he definitely knew that something had happened with her family, although he had never pried very much. He had a lot that had happened with his own family, and Clary knew that his only living relative was his younger sister who was now in a rest home.

"Okay, well, you have my number, so you ring whenever you need it, even if it's in the middle of the day," Raphael told her and Clary couldn't help her smile. She knew that Raphael would be there for her, even if it was one in the afternoon in, which was the same as one in the morning for the rest of them.

"I know, thanks," Clary murmured. Raphael didn't say anything for a few long moments, and Clary just felt better knowing that he was on the other end of the phone.

"Alright," Raphael said quietly. "I'll talk to you later."

"Bye, Raph," Clary replied before taking her phone away from her ear. She looked down at the screen for a few beats, waiting until the screen turned black and then she tucked it into the pocket down the side of her leg. Things with Raphael were easy, and they were that way because both of them knew that they weren't going to last forever. Raphael knew that Clary had a mate, and Clary knew that Raphael was going to outlive her by decades. They both got on and they were comfortable with each other and things were relaxed and she liked what they had.

But what they had was nothing compared to just a few seconds of that fire that she felt when Jace had touched the back of her neck.

Clary spent a few minutes breathing in the air, just thinking about what she was meant to be doing for the rest of the day—for the rest of the _week_ —she had no idea how long she was going to be here for, and then decided to get back to the house. It took her ten minutes to run back, going at a slower pace than before, even though her wolf wanted to be reckless and run as fast as she could go, and when she broke through the treeline, she couldn't help but feel love bubble up inside her.

Catarina Loss was sitting on the deck of the house, on the swing seat that was very similar to the one that had been on the deck of their first house. She had a thick blue blanket wrapped around her, and her unruly hair was in a braid over her shoulder. She didn't look in Clary's direction as she came toward the stairs, but there was a gentle smile on her face which said that she knew Clary was right there.

"Hey, baby," Catarina murmured as Clary came over and got onto the seat next to her, and she lifted her arm to wrap around the younger girl. "It's been a while since I've seen you. I knew you would be back," she smoothed Clary's hair away from her face, the strands that escaped the hair tie. "You belong here, baby."

It annoyed Clary when Simon told her that she needed to go back to Del Mar, and it annoyed Clary when her mother said it.

It was different when it was Catarina.

The woman was the emissary of the Greymark pack, and she had been the emissary of the Morgenstern pack before then. She was a powerful warlock, a healer, and she was one of the only members who had been there through the whole mess that was Clary's childhood, and then through Valentine's downfall and now she was still here.

Clary snuggled herself into Catarina's side, pulling her legs up onto the swing seat as well, and she turned her head into Catarina's shoulder, taking in deep breaths of the healer scent, of the comforting magic that surrounded her, and she let herself be lulled into sleep finally.

 **So songs I recommend are _I Think I'm OKAY_ by MGK, Yungblud and Travis Baker, which I absolutely adore, and the song and especially the music video give me intense early 2000's feels, and _Lost_ by Dermont Kennedy, which is so damn beautiful, I've completely fallen in love with it. Also _Lost Without You_ by Freya Ridlings, which was sent to me by _Reppinda5o3_ and is completely heart breaking. Umm...I can't really think of many movies and TV series I've been watching lately. Sorry :( **

**Okay, so, questions; what's your lockscreen/homescreen/blah blah blah? My lockscreen is Dominic Harrison and my homescreen is Demi Lovato, both total babes.**

 **Umm...What are you go-to feel good movies? Mine are—not in any type of order— _Princess Bride, The Swan Princess, Stardust, Spirit_ and _Frozen_. Lol. Not even sorry. I think _Catch and Release_ might be working its way onto this list as well. **

**...' _Please tell me I'm your one and only/Or lie and say at least tonight/I've got a brand new cure for lonely/And if you give me what I want/Then I'll give you what you like_ '...**

 **xxxxxxx**


	6. Chapter 6

"Oh my god," Clary breathed out with a smile as she looked around at the bustling markets. "It's exactly the same as when I was last here." Jocelyn, now Jocelyn Greymark, smiled and wrapped an arm around Clary's shoulders, pulling her in tight against her side and and pressing a kiss to her temple.

"I'm glad you're back," Jocelyn told her. "And I'm not—I'm not saying that as in you're back _permanently_ ," she gave Clary a small smile before pulling away to adjust the canvas bags on her arm. "You ready?"

"Yeah," Clary smiled back at her mum as they walked from the car park and toward the markets. Clary used to come here a lot when she was younger, almost every week, up until she left for New York. Werewolves weren't big fans of pesticides and food that had been overly processed—although Clary did have a weak spot for fried chicken and cream filled donuts—and so coming to the markets and getting fresh fruit and vegetables that were all natural, or as close to natural as possible, were the best way to go. Jocelyn had her main spots that she went to, and Clary trailed along behind her, happy to just watch everything around her.

It was her second day back at home, and she was steadily feeling better than she had in _so long_. She was trying not to think about it too much, but it was hard not to, when her body and her wolf had pretty much been rejecting her over the past year and a bit. Simon had called her last night, pissed off that she disappeared without explaining things to him, but also grudgingly happy for her that she had gone back home and was feeling better without needing Simon's magic. Clary still wasn't sure what was happening, how long she was going to be staying, so she was just taking everything one step at a time.

"Clary?" Jocelyn asked, tilting her head to the side and raising an eyebrow expectantly.

"What?" Clary blinked, focusing on her mum.

"Did you want one?" Jocelyn waved a finger at a stall that was selling organic juices and Clary nodded before looking over at another stall that was selling jewelry. She walked over and flashed a smile at the young girl who was sitting behind the set up desk and reached out to touch some of the bracelets. There were lots of multi-coloured ones, and she trailed her fingers over a few groupings, picking up a necklace with a bone carving, trailing her finger over the bone before her head snapped up.

Jace.

She could smell Jace.

"Are you alright?" The girl with pink in her hair behind the desk gave her a funny look, and Clary guessed that she did look a bit odd, gripping the necklace so tightly that the bone was now cutting into the palm of her head as she whipped her head around, trying to find out where the scent was coming from. There were so many smells surrounding them, coming up from the beach and from throughout the market, and she couldn't pinpoint the direction that it was coming from.

Until she could suddenly see him.

And a stunning girl with dark hair and bright red lipstick.

And they were walking straight toward Jocelyn.

Clary blinked and watched as they approached her mother, and she turned around and smiled widely at them, and then she reached out and _hugged_ Jace. Jace was smiling as he gave her a squeeze and then pulled back, and then the dark haired girl leaned in to hug Jocelyn as well. She and Jocelyn started talking animatedly, while Jace's head turned, and then his eyes landed directly on her, and Clary felt a jolt run through her body.

"Are you going to buy that?" The girl behind the desk asked and Clary turned back to the girl, but there was this rushing sound in her ears and she _knew_ that Jace was getting closer even though her back was now to him, and she was staring down at this stupid necklace that had now left indents in her palm.

"Uh," Clary swallowed hard.

"Do you like it?" Jace asked, suddenly behind her, _right there_ , and Clary's body was simultaneous on complete edge, like it had been set on fire and there were a thousand little sparklers embedded underneath her skin, and incredibly relaxed and sated all at this same time.

The whole thing was fucking ridiculous.

"No," Clary stated and dropped the necklace back to the table. The pink haired girl arched an eyebrow at her, and Clary flashed her a quick, apologetic smile before picking up about ten bracelets that were tied together with a little string. They were all in blues and greens with little metal beads and it was the sort of thing that she would actually wear. "But I like these."

"Okay," Jace nodded, and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket.

"Oh, no—it's fine," Clary took her own wallet out of the front pocket of her jeans, but Jace was already opening his up and pulling out a twenty dollar note. The pink haired girl had big eyes as Jace handed the money to her with a friendly smile, which Clary could understand, because Jace was beautiful.

"D-did you want a bag?" The girl asked, looking back at Clary.

"It's okay," Clary told her with a small smile, slipping the bracelets onto her wrist. They didn't quite sit the way she would like, but that was because they still had a little string keeping them all together. She would sort it out later. Right now she just needed to get some space.

"Thank you," Jace gave the girl another smile and then looked at Clary expectantly. She gave him a small nod and they stepped away from the stall. They didn't head over to where Jocelyn and Jace's friend was standing, they started walking toward where the grass turned to sand, leading onto the beach. "You seem...Better," he noted as they walked through the last of the stalls and were able to have a unhindered view of the beach.

"I feel better," Clary dipped her head in another nod. "Which you undoubtedly already know." Jace nodded and he took in a deep breath and then looked back at Clary stopped. He watched as she leaned down to take off her sandals and roll up the hem of her jeans. "It's been _forever_ since I've felt sand underneath my feet," Clary couldn't help but smile up at Jace, and Jace blinked at her, looking surprised, and Clary quickly dropped her face, because that might have been the first time she had given him a smile that felt completely genuine and came from deep in her stomach.

Clary straightened back up, her sandals in one hand and she wiggled her feet around a little bit, so that they sunk in the sand, and she took in a deep breath, drawing in the salty breeze from the ocean and the happiness from the people at the market and...And Jace. She started walking to the beach, but she made sure to half turn her body back for the first couple of steps, so that she was angled toward Jace and he didn't feel as though she was walking away from him. He walked slowly, about a step and a half behind her, letting her lead the way.

Clary walked all the way to the water front, into the shallow water, so that it trickled over her feet and lapped at her ankles. She closed her eyes, tipping her head backwards to look up at the clear blue sky, the sun just behind her and squinting through her eyelashes. Jace stayed where the white sand was still dry, just a few feet behind her and he tried to just _breathe_ despite how happy his wolf was, practically throwing itself against Jace's rib cage, trying to escape and reach out for Clary.

After a few moments, she turned back around to look at Jace, letting her chin dip back down and met his eyes.

It wasn't just a short meet of the eyes either, it was drawn out and intense, and Jace couldn't help but let the red in his eyes show. Clary responded in kind, her eyes glowing a gorgeous gold that was striking with her red hair that was curling around her face and blowing gently in the breeze in front of her eyes.

Jace's stomach jumped into his throat and his eyes flashed brighter for a moment before he cleared his throat and dropped his eyes to where the water was licking at the sand, letting his eyes settle back to their normal colour. Clary's toes came into his line of sight as she took a few steps forward, trailing her toes in the sand, kicking up little tufts that quickly got washed away by the water. Jace let his eyes lift upward, over her legs and torso and then settling back on her face.

"We need to talk," Clary stated.

"We do," Jace nodded, surprised and _very_ glad that she was the one who had prompted that discussion. She glanced around, eyes falling on a German Shepherd that was jogging through the water near them, and then over to where it's owner, a dad with his little girl, was standing. "Now probably isn't the time."

"Or...More the place just doesn't really work," Clary pointed out.

"Yeah, the time has come and gone a few times over," Jace pointed out, cracking a small smile that obviously wasn't meant to be cruel. Clary rolled her eyes playfully before planting both of feet solidly in the sand and looking up, taking in a deep breath through her teeth.

"Thank you," she told him. Jace's eyebrows pulled together.

"For bringing you back?" He asked.

"Nah, for what you did," Clary swallowed hard and lifted her hand to scratch the side of her neck, her eyes dropping, and Jace was surprised by the nervousness that was coming off Clary in waves. "What you did the first time we met. That night. In the woods." Clary's fingernails moved and scratch at the side of her nose, and Jace wanted to reach out to her, and pull her in close to them.

That's what he would do with any member of his pack.

And Clary was so much more than that.

But he just flexed his fingers at his side, curled them into fists and didn't move from where he was standing.

"I never said that—said thank you," Clary took another step so that she was directly in front of Jace. He had only ever been this close to her twice before, and one of those times had been just a few days before when he had dropped her off at Luke's house, so he struggled to. "I've never said that. It's not like we've ever talked about it, or anything...But I kinda figured out in therapy a few years ago that I couldn't blame you for...Anything. In fact, I should thank you."

Jace blinked at her.

"You have a therapist that you've talked to about this?" He asked.

"She's a vampire," Clary's lips pulled back in a sheepish smile, obviously glad for the slight change in topic. "I tried seeing a human one but it got way to hard to twist things to be...Understandable to them. Raph—" she blinked before changing quickly what she was saying. "A friend recommended her to me, and it's amazing. Years and years of wisdom in there."

"I guess so," Jace shrugged and he rolled his shoulders backwards, and he was happy for her, happy that she had someone who could help her.

"I kind of guess that we're going to need to talk about a lot and I figure that maybe I'll just...Get that out of the way," Clary said, and she finally let her hand drop to her side, stopping with scratching at her face, a nervous gesture. "Before we really get any further." Jace nodded and then winced a little.

"It's probably not something you ever thought you'd be thanking anyone for," Jace murmured, he licked his lower lip nervously as he thought back to the night that he had first met Clary, one that replayed itself every time he closed his eyes. Given he had met his mate that day, it was one of the best of his life. But for Clary, it had to be one of the worst, if not _the_ worst, although Jace had heard stories from Luke and Jocelyn about when she was younger, and maybe of those were the worst. But he knew that it had to rank low on that list.

"It's more...The you saving my ass sort of thank you, not what followed," Clary dropped her eyes back to the water. "The stuff that came after...I don't want to talk about that with you. At least, not right now." Jace nodded quickly, because he could absolutely understand that.

Although they would have to talk about it.

And honestly, Jace had been waiting six years, and he was ready for answers.

But he also understood he couldn't force Clary.

He didn't _want_ to force Clary.

"Maybe we should...Meet up. Some time. _Soon_ ," Jace said and Clary looked hesitant, but she nodded a couple of times. "Did you want me to come over to Luke's?" Clary's eyes widened and she shook her head sharply once.

"No, uh—maybe yours?" She suggested, but she looked like she regretted it as soon as she said it. Jace could imagine how overwhelming stepping into his pack home for the first time, especially given their bond wasn't _that_ strong, and she wouldn't be able to use him to anchor her.

"There's a place I've been working on," Jace began. "It's not our pack house, it's somewhere that I'm...Doing myself," he wasn't about to tell her that while renovating the old barn house, he was thinking about somewhere that Clary might be comfortable one day. "It's still on the same property, but it's not quite—"

"The same as your place," Clary nodded quickly. "Okay."

"Yeah?" Jace tried not to let his face break out in a huge smile and scare her off, so he took in a deep breath and probably had a really awkward wobbly expression on his face. "Did you want to come tonight?" Clary blinked.

"Uh," her eyes widened and glowed a golden colour that she was clearly trying to suppress, and then her hand lifted and went to her neck again, reaching back and scratching, fingers pressing just underneath the curve of her jaw. Jace's eyes dropped to her hand, and he couldn't help but think that the spot that she had touched twice in the past couple of minutes was the same spot where he had touched her just a couple of days ago. "Can we make it tomorrow? Tomorrow morning?"

"You got plans already?" Jace asked, already knowing as the words came out that he sounded a little...Too curious.

"I've got a friend coming in tonight. He's _just_ a friend," Clary quickly said. "Flying in tonight. He was pretty insistent that he come...Usually I can't get through a couple of nights away from him, so he really wants to check on me."

"Right," Jace jerked his head in a nod, because he knew that Clary had a completely separate life in New York that he had no idea about it, and that he was going to need to learn about it and the people in it.

"He's totally harmless," Clary continued, as though to reassure him. "And I know generally people speak directly to you when someone supernatural is coming into the district, but...Luke said that he was going to see you today and so I asked that he talk to you about it." Jace nodded, and couldn't help but be a little disappointed that Luke hadn't prompted Clary further to ask herself, but he knew that Luke was just doing what was best for Clary. "He's a warlock, but...He's just here to see me, not to cause any trouble."

Jace had heard Clary speak several times before now. A _lot_ of times, actually, even if most of those times were just talking to other people and not directly to him. But none of those times had she sounded as nervous as she did right now.

He really didn't like it, but there wasn't much he could do about it now.

"I think your friend is trying to get your attention," Clary pointed over Jace's shoulder and he turned around to see Isabelle no longer with Jocelyn, but on the sand and waving pointedly at him. Jace nodded and he turned back around, to say something to Clary before they parted ways although he wasn't too sure what, but she was already walking past him, toes splashing out of the water, and walking up onto the beach. Jace watched her go, chewing down on his lower lip, and then caught Isabelle pulling faces at him, undoubtedly mocking him.

"Always a charmer," Jace muttered as he started walking toward his beta.

 **Alright! Another mass update! I'm just...In a super shitty place right now, completely mental, my life is actually in a really good space—isn't it great when that happens? But writing is generally therapeutic so...Here we go.**

 **Movies I would recommend would be _Where The Heart Is_ , which is an old time favourite for me, and _How To Be Single_ , which I actually quite like, even though I don't like Dakota Johnson. It's like my love for Leslie Mann cancels that out though. Haha. I don't know...Both of these movies make me really sad and happy at the same time, so it's good.**

 **Songs that I've recently fallen in love with are _Perfectly Wrong_ by Shawn Mendes, _Chateau_ by Angus & Julia Stone, _You Make It Easy_ by Jason Aldean and _Marry Me_ by Thomas Rhett. Recommend any songs that you guys have had on repeat recently :)**

 **Hope you're all doing well, and please leave a review and let me know what you thought of the chapter because I love your comments x**


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay, this is gonna be another one of these months you get two updates in month, so...*throws internet cookies***

Clary hadn't quite been telling the truth when she was talking to Jace earlier. She hadn't been lying either, or there was a chance that Jace may have been able to pick up on it from any skips in her heat beat, but when she had said that Luke was going to talk to Jace about Simon coming to visit. And about Simon coming to visit in general.

Not _entirely_ , because after her phone call with Simon this morning, she had been considering asking Simon to come out and see her anyway, and Jace hadn't looked too bothered when she had said that someone supernatural was coming into his territory. So on her way back from the market, sitting in the passenger seat of her mothers car, she sent a text to Simon, asking for him to come out, and said that she would get Luke to talk to Jace tonight, because he had mentioned at breakfast that morning that he had to go and see Jace, just like Clary had told him.

Simon replied almost instantly and said he was booking a flight.

There were a lot of warlocks who could create portals and step right through, but Simon wasn't like that. There were a lot of things that Simon couldn't do, something about a curse from a powerful seelie that he had had a run in with when he was still a young warlock, so he would have to take a flight, like pretty much everyone else. She still wasn't sure if that was the reason that he had to wear glasses or if he just did it as a fashion statement, but right now, she just wanted Simon to be there. She'd managed to centre herself and she was feeling better and she felt as though she could deal with all of Simon's questions and him fussing over her, and she just wanted her best friend there.

Jocelyn didn't mention Jace or the girl that he was at the market with, even though she obviously knew that Clary and Jace had spoken, and Clary appreciated that because it wasn't something she wanted to talk about.

Obviously she was going to _need_ to talk about it, and her and Jace were actually going to talk tomorrow, and she couldn't just take that away from Jace after committing to it when they had been standing on the beach. She couldn't take it away from herself either, because she knew it was something that she had to do.

* * *

Luke hadn't been too happy when Clary had asked him to talk to Jace that night.

"You've already mentioned that Simon's going to be coming. Why don't you just call him?" He asked. Clary pursed her lips together and tried not to huff because Luke had never really pushed her to talk to Jace before. Admittedly, they'd never been in a situation where Clary directly _needed_ to talk to Jace, so that could be why. "I've got his number, if you don't." She _did_ , but that wasn't the point.

"I'm seeing him tomorrow, and we're gonna talk then. I just don't...Really want to talk to him again," Clary muttered, knowing that she sounded a bit like a child as she looked down at her bare feet. Luke stared at her for a few beats before reaching forward and wrapping a hand gently around the back of her neck.

It was the second time in such a short amount that she had been touched that way, a hand around the base of her neck, and it made Clary's whole body feel limp, complete relaxation roll over her at the safety and security and love that came from the touch. The back of the neck was a sensitive spot for werewolves, an intimate one. Generally the only ones who would teach each other there would be parents when their pups were younger, Alpha's of a pack or, mainly, mates. There were other circumstances, and a people outside of the usual three did happen, but it had nowhere near the same sort of effect.

Which meant even if Clary was best friends or sleeping with someone, she didn't want them touching her neck. Even Simon, who had been supporting and healing her physically as well as mentally for the past five years, or Catarina, who Clary had known her whole life, didn't touch her on her neck.

On purpose, four people had held her neck—fingers pressed to one side of her throat and a thumb to the other, palm pressed firmly; her mother, her father, Luke and Jace.

Of course there had been some others, hardly on purpose, and all human except for Raphael.

Raphael never touched that spot _directly_ , or with his palm gripping her, but he had a bit of a habit of trailing kisses down her spine, or wrapping a fist in her hair at the base of her neck. He knew how important that spot was to a werewolf—as someone who had been a part of the supernatural world for nearly eighty years—but he still made passes there. It had never been so direct that Clary had pushed him away, but it had been enough to make her feel strange for a few moments as it happened.

Clary let out a heavy breath and Luke leaned forward to press a kiss against the top of her head before he left the room, and she hoped that meant that he was going to talk to Jace tonight on her behalf.

She spent the rest of the day in her room, watching Netflix on the small TV that Luke had put in her room a couple of years ago. Simon got one of the last minute flights and text when he got on board, and she surfed Instagram and Twitter idly, even though she barely took in anything that she saw because her mind was still running through her brief moment with Jace this morning and the fact that they were going to be meeting up tomorrow to _talk_ and she had no idea what she was going to say.

She actually ended up falling asleep without realizing it.

* * *

"Clary, baby," came a soothing voice and Clary blinked as she opened her eyes. Catarina was standing above her with a small smile on her face as she stroked her fingers through Clary's tangled hair that was splayed out across the pillow. "Your friend is nearly here," she told the younger girl quietly and Clary blinked again as she wiped her hand over her face, looking toward the window and seeing that the sky was getting dark, so she had obviously been asleep for some time—her body just trying to catch up on everything that it had missed in the past couple of years.

"You can feel him?" Clary asked, voice a bit husky from sleep and Catarina nodded. Catarina and Simon had never met before, but given they were both warlocks and both specialized in healing, their magic was similar, and so they would be able to sense each other when they were in each others vicinity. Catarina nodded and then she left the room, giving Clary a chance to wake up properly. Clary sat up in her bed and wiped at her eyes again and looked at the time on her phone, which said it was just after six in the evening. There was a message from Simon over an hour ago that said he was in a car and on his way to her, so it shouldn't be too long before he arrived. She pulled her fingers through her hair and braided it over her shoulder, and then her nose twitched.

Clary smelt Simon before he was even down the driveway. There was also the messy scent of the uber that Simon had taken, of course, but there was always this very specific scent when it came to warlocks, this sharp smell of fresh magic. Clary let out a sigh of relief from where she was laying down on her childhood bed, pushing herself up and walking down the hall. There were other scents as well—the werewolves that now made up her mother and Lukes new pack and the fact that they were all cooking dinner now—but Clary angled herself around them, carefully avoiding them until she got to the front door. The uber was pulling up as she skipped down the front steps.

"Clary!" Simon was shouting, already opening the door even though the car hadn't stopped. The driver jammed their foot on the brake as they realized that the door was open, and Simon did an awkward jerk and hop but was then steady on both feet. "Shit—it's so hot here!" He grumbled as he hugged her and Clary just grinned and wrapped her arms around him.

"Thank you for coming," she mumbled. Her body leaned heavily against him and Simon took her weight easily, even though he was pretty lanky and didn't seem to have much muscle to him.

"Of course, Clary," Simon whispered into her hair and Clary let out a heavy sigh. Catarina's magic was something that she had grown up with and while it was something that she associated with love and pack, and it was also unfortunately something that also subconsciously got associated with her father. Simon was something different, a person that she had sought out on her own and who was completely separate from the pack that she had grown up, and the pack that they had shifted into after Valentine had been killed and from Jace, and it was comforting to know that he was purely on her side and there to just support her. They just stood there, hugging for a few long moments before there was the pointed sound of someone clearing their throat. Clary didn't want to let go of Simon, but when there was _another_ clearing of someones throat, Simon pulled back and looked over at the uber driver, who was watching them with raised eyebrows.

"I am all for this romantic reunion," the driver said flatly, shoving his dark, greasy hair away from his face. "But if I could just get paid, and then I'll you two to it?" Simon squeezed her arms one last time before he stepped back completely and turned back to the driver, getting out his wallet to pay the driver before moving to get his bags out of the boot. Once the car was driving away, and Simon's scent was stronger now that there weren't so many strange scents obstructing it, Clary felt calmer.

"Come inside?" She offered and Simon nodded, throwing an arm around her shoulders.

* * *

Jace could smell Isabelle before he heard her, but that was normal, because she was good at being utterly silent when she wanted to creep up on someone. There was a creak of one of the wooden planks on the deck as the came up the stairs, and Jace heard the slight whisper of some hanging plastic sheeting getting pushed to the side, and then when she was a few feet behind him, he heard her breathing. He ignored her, though, leaving it up to his beta to start the conversation since she was the one who had sought him out.

"It's almost nine," Isabelle stated, unnecessarily, because Jace had a phone with the time on it, and he could feel the tug of the moon high in the sky. "You've been out here since we got back from the market. I thought you'd at least come up after Luke left," she continued when Jace didn't reply. He didn't say anything then either, looking back down at the door that he was sanding, light coming from the bare bulb above him. He ran his fingers along the smooth edge and nodded to himself, putting down the sander as Isabelle's lips tightened in the corners, never too happy with being ignored. "She's shorter than I remember," she muttered and Jace didn't given her the satisfaction of looking over at her, making her let out a sigh and close the distance between them, resting against an exposed wooden beam. "You planning on staying out here all night?" She asked.

"I'll be in shortly," Jace told her. "Don't worry about it."

"You missed dinner," she pointed out. "Max wasn't very happy about that." Jace winced internally, because he instantly felt bad about this. He actually vaguely remembered Maryse and Robert Lightwood saying that they would be at the house for dinner that night, and Max would obviously be with them.

"I'll go and see him tomorrow morning," Jace murmured. Max was one of the youngest in their pack at sixteen, and Jace spent quite a bit of time one-on-one with him, making sure Max always knew how important he was to the pack and to Jace himself. He stayed over most weekends and sometimes through the week, and came over for breakfast before school started occasionally, even if it meant that he ended up running late to his first class of the day. Jace always felt bad about missing dinner if Max was coming over.

"I think he just wanted to see if Clary was going to be here," Isabelle told him and Jace shrugged.

"It's going to be a while before than happens, I think," he replied, and Isabelle pursed her lips together, easily able to pick up on the scent of sadness that rolled off him. It would have been easy to pick it up even if she wasn't one of his pack and close to him, given how strong the sudden scent was.

"The fact that she came back with you...That's a big thing," Isabelle reasoned softly, and Jace appreciated what she was trying to do, even if it wasn't really going to work. Isabelle wasn't the only one in his pack that was wary of Clary, given how she fought against their very nature—against the mate bond that so many werewolves would spend their lives looking for—and had been so much distance between herself and their Alpha. Even before Jace had _been_ their Alpha, he had still been a part of their pack, and they had all been able to feel the hurt that he was dealing with, separated from his mate. Jace had always been closest to Isabelle and Alec, and Alec was definitely the more reasonable and level-headed one out of the pair, while Isabelle had a tendency to let her emotions cloud her judgement at times, which is why she seemed to have a hard time with Clary.

She _wanted_ to like her, because on the two occasions that she had met her—not counting their brush at the market—they had got on well. Admittedly, they had been when they were a lot younger, before Clary had ever met Jace and before anyone had known about the abuse in the Morgenstern pack. She also wanted to like her because she was her Alpha's _mate_ , and that meant that she was one of the most important people in their pack, even if she hadn't stepped into that position yet. But Isabelle couldn't let go of the years that had passed that had left Jace suffering.

"Look, I want it all to work out this time, okay?" Isabelle said haltingly, trying to find the right words. "But maybe don't throw yourself into getting this place ready for her to move in just yet," she waved a hand around the half shell of a home around them that they all _knew_ was something that Jace always intended to live in only once his mate came home.

"I don't think anyones going to be living in here anytime soon, Izzy," Jace told her and Isabelle shrugged a shoulder, not sure what else to say. But then Jace was wiping down his hands and reaching out for her, circling an arm around her shoulders and pulling her in close against his chest so that her head was resting there. They didn't say anything, but Isabelle felt Jace's wolf calming her down, just through their simple touches, and in turn, she could feel him feeling a little better as well.

 **I watched the movie _It's Kind of a Funny Story_ for the first time, I've been meaning to watch it for years, but I just never had. I'm really glad I did, so I definitely recommend it. It's got Zach Galifianakis, Viola Davis and Emma Roberts and it's just a really really good. Sort of similar to _Perks of Being a Wallflower_ , although nowhere near as good since that's my favourite movie of all time. Haha. Also as I'm writing this, we're watching _Big Hero 6_ and I just adore this movie so much. They're all just amazing, and Tadashi is just...The most beautiful person in the world. Oh, and the other day I watched _Need For Speed_ again, which is just a mindlessly car racing movie, but I love Aaron Paul and Imogen Poots and so it's great. Haha.**

 **For TV shows, I've recently started _The Bold Type_ , and I'm completely in love, the three main girls are adorable, I don't know which one is my favourite so far. None? All? All, I think. And I absolutely love Alex. And Jacqueline is a fucking goddess. Honestly, the show just makes me so happy. Also _Crashing_ , which was fucking hilarious. Some of the lines in it were really cruel, actually, which kind of cut for a comedy show. I absolutely fucking LOVED Melody and Colin and Sam. Particularly Melody. Also, _Derry Girls_ , I've recommended it before, I'll do it again. Haha. My husband and I have watched it sooooooo many times, it's generally our go-to when stoned. Haha.**

 **Okay, so songs... Uh, some old ones I've been listening to— _Forever_ and _Sex Metal Barbie_ by In This Moment, um, also _Blood_ and _Adrenalize_. Slow _Fade_ by Ruth B, which is beautiful, _Cringe_ by Matt Maeson and the acoustic version is even better. _None Of My Business_ by Cher Lloyd and _Takeaway_ by The Chainsmokers and then _Hope For The Underrated Youth_ by Yungblud, which I bawled my eyes out over the first few times I listened to it.**

 **Okay; questions...Anyone into _Veronica Mars_? Anyone been into Veronica Mars since they were a child? Oh my god. I was so fucking disappointed by the reboot. Like, my entire heart dropped. I only got two episodes in, and I wasn't really enjoying it, I just felt like Veronica wasn't characterized well, she had actually regressed, and then I read the ending, and I just refused to go on. So...That's disappointment dating back to my primary school days.**

 **Umm...Favourite song right now? Mine is _hammer_ by nothing,nowhere.**

 **And how many tattoos do you have? I've just gotten my second one, and I think I'm getting a third in November, and then I've got plans for, like, four others.**

 **Anyway, drop a review, they make my day :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey, guys! Just a quick heads up that I'm not sure if there will be two updates for every story next month, like there has been for the past couple months, we'll just see how it goes. Working a lot at the moment and my husband and I are doing renovations on our home and just general busy life stuff, so don't have a lot of free time right now x**

"Stop... _Stop_!" Simon swatted at Clary's hands as they lifted to tug at her hair for the umpteenth time in the past hour. "Fucking hell, I'm not good at this sort of shit."

"You're doing a great job, Si," Clary rolled her eyes. "Super comforting." Simon narrowed his eyes at her, hearing the obvious sarcasm, and he flopped back onto her bed.

"Well, you're the one that's been avoiding him for so long that it's worked up to be some big ass climax now," he mumbled and Clary could barely stop herself from snapping her teeth at the warlock.

" _Don't_ say climax," she growled and Simon snorted.

" _Don't_ be immature," he grinned. "I mean, I don't think a climax would hurt anyone here, if I'm being honest. I mean, you're clearly tense and Raphael isn't here to help you with that, and I bet that Jace would be completely into it, from everything I've heard about him from you and your mum. He sounds as though he's completely head over heels for you—I mean, he knew that things had been getting worse for you and he flew all the way to New York just to come and get you."

"Some people would call that possessive," Clary arched an eyebrow, her voice low.

"Some people would call that romantic," Simon countered and Clary sighed as she moved to pull on a pair of ankle boots. It was just after nine, and even though Clary and Jace hadn't set a time that they were going to meet that morning, she had sort of thought that it would be best to go over early on. Her exact words to Simon and Jocelyn last night before she had gone to bed had been to ' _get it over with_ ' although she wasn't sure that was exactly how she felt.

A part of her even felt excited, although that was only a _very_ small part, something that she wasn't even admitting to herself right now, because Jace and his pack and the fact they were mates was something that she had kept locked away and forced back for so long now, and the reality that it was all so close and possibly within her grasp was all just a little bit too much for her to deal with. So she didn't let herself think about that _too_ much, just trying to think about what she was going to be dealing with _right now_ , taking in a deep breath as she straightened back up again.

"Okay?" She asked as she looked back over at Simon, glancing down at what she was wearing. It was simple, a grey pair of jeans, a light purple shirt with a grey cardigan and a dark pair of ankle boots. Simon gave her a thumbs up and she rolled her eyes. "You're very helpful."

"I'm not...Good with clothes and shit, you know that," he shrugged a shoulder.

"You're a terrible gay best friend," she retorted.

"That's a stereotype that I refuse to play into," Simon sung out as he sat up on her bed and swung his legs over the side. "Besides, I've been attracted to woman before. Maybe I will be again. Sexuality is a spectrum, not a box to conform to." Clary arched her eyebrows at him, wondering if this was going to turn into a lecture, but he seemed happy to leave it there, which was good, because they had had many good conversations about sexuality and third wave feminism and toxic masculinity over a few drinks, but she really just didn't have the mental capacity for that right now. "You look good, you will be fine, just _breathe_ and...Remember he already loves you," he grinned and shrugged a shoulder. "You're mates, so it doesn't really matter what you do, he's always gonna love you." But instead of reassuring her, like he obviously intended, Clary winced and looked down at the toes of her boots, and Simon quickly got off the bed. "I—didn't mean it like that..."

"I know, Si," Clary mumbled. "It's just...Things haven't exactly been the easiest between us. _I_ haven't been the easiest. And I know he's stuck with me, literally can't have this kind of bond with anyone else, so...It's gotta suck to be him." Simon cringed at how his words had come off and he rested his hands on her shoulders, giving them a squeeze.

"Clary," he said quietly. "You dealt with a lot when you were younger. He knows that you went through a lot with your parents, with your dad, and he seems to have been pretty understanding up until this point. You just need...Be honest with him. _Talk_ to him." Clary raised her head and met his eyes, and then gave him a small smile.

"You're wrong about what you said before," she told him as she leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek. "You _are_ pretty good at this kind of shit."

* * *

Jace had sent her a text late last night, that had woken Clary up with the vibrations on her bedside table grating her sensitive hearing, and all it had given was an address and simple directions. It was the address for his pack home, which she did actually know, because she had asked her mother about it a few years ago when she had still been studying at college and had been visiting through one of the holidays. She had never actually gone to the address, but she had written it down on a piece of note paper, and folded it up and it was still tucked into one of her favourite books in her bookshelves in her bedroom at Luke and Jocelyn's. He had said to turn off the main driveway at the first right drive, and just keep driving along the path until he reached a clearing where an old barn house was.

The sun was shining and there were no clouds in the sky, and the closer Clary got to Jace, the more relaxed she felt. Even that anxious knot in her stomach that had been there ever since she and Jace had gone their separate ways on the beach yesterday had begun to relax. Jace was about forty-five minutes from where Luke's place was in Del Mar, on the other side of Oceanside, and she turned the radio up as she drove, winding down her windows and letting in the fresh air and the clean, crisp scents that she didn't have access to in the middle of New York.

She also liked being behind the wheel of a car again, something that she didn't really get to do in New York, other than when she would drive Simon or Raphael's cars.

Clary swallowed hard as she got to the driveway of Jace's place, slowing down her mothers car and turning into the driveway, which was all mud and stone, and she pursed her lips together as she drove up the drive. There were tall trees on either side of the drive, beautiful and leafy and she had to slam on the brakes when she caught a glimpse of a break in the trees to signal a more narrow driveway, given the branches practically hid the gap. She turned down the drive and kept going. It didn't take long until the trees broke and she was in a grassy clearing, and there was a barn house with all it's windows and doors open and the Camaro that Jace had been driving the other day was parked up alongside the wooden deck that looked half finished by the sliding doors. Clary pulled up next to the car and got out of her car, taking a moment to breathe and listen.

She could smell Jace, very strongly, all around her, in the trees and the grass and coming from car and the house, and there were other scents as well. He could smell the girl from the beach, who had been with Jace, and the two who had come to to her apartment and taken the flight back with them, and others, who were clearly Jace's pack. She couldn't hear him inside though, and she tilted her head to the side as she glanced around, looking into the trees, trying to hear anything.

And then she did.

There were the sounds of two people running through the woods around her, and it sounded as though they were getting closer. One of them was clearly faster and lighter on their feet, and the other seemed to be younger and not as nimble, because they created a lot more noise, and Clary smiled as she turned her body in the direction of the sound as the two people got closer to the edge of the woods, closer to the clearing, and then they broke through the treeline, Jace first and then someone else behind him, laughing as they tried to reach out and grab Jace. Jace laughed and just darted out of the way, continuing to run toward the house, eyes a little narrow as he shifted his direction just a bit so that he was heading toward Clary.

"Shit!" Clary squeaked out with a laugh as she ducked to the side as Jace barely slowed down in time to stop beside her, and then the younger boy joined them, unable to stop at all, and Jace reached out a strong arm and banded it around him, managing to stop him and pulling him in close, steadying him on his feet. The whole thing was surprising, but not unwelcome, and the knot in her stomach loosened a little bit more, the nervous tension in her shoulders not as tight.

"Clary, right?!" The kid blurted out as he looked up at Clary, his floppy fringe a little matted and stuck to his forehead, while Jace barely looked as though he had _broken_ a sweat.

"Yeah," Clary smiled at him. "Yeah, I am."

"I'm Max, Alec and Izzy's brother," he announced, still leaning in close to Jace, clearly very comfortable with his Alpha.

"Sorry, I didn't know what time you were coming over this morning," Jace began. "And I missed seeing Max last night—"

"So he called and promised that he would take me out for a run today, since I have a free first period at school," Max concluded, still grinning, looking adorable and ruffled and Clary still couldn't stop herself from smiling back. Things were quiet for a moment before Jace's hand shifted from around Max to ruffle at his hair and then drop it down to his side.

"Alright, I'll get you some water, and then you head up to the house to get your car and go to school, okay?" Jace said, giving Max a pointed look, and Max's grin faltered a little at that. Clary wasn't sure if it was because Jace was telling him that he needed to go back to school or if it was because he was being told to leave and give them some time alone. But either way, he was still leaning against Jace's side as the three of them turned and began walking up to the house, taking the few wooden steps up onto the deck and then stepping into the house. Clary couldn't help but glance around as she stepped in, and she was surprised by how empty the place was, the fact that it really was just the shell of a house. They went into the kitchen, where it was practically empty except for a bench and a sink still in one corner, and a fridge that was plugged in. Jace moved away from Max and walked over to the fridge, opening it up.

Clary tilted her head to the side as she looked over at the teenager with flushed cheeks, whose eyes were flicking between Clary and Jace with great interest. Jace didn't look too surprised, although he rolled his eyes and there was a small smile on his mouth as he picked up a bottle of water and handed it over to the teenager, closing the gap between them again.

"Max," he said, voice bordering just a little on the edge of stern. "Go up to the house now, okay?" Max looked like he really wanted to _stay_ , but he didn't say anything, he just took the bottle of water and leaned against Jace for a moment, in a subtle way to seek warmth from his Alpha, before grinning over at Clary.

"It was nice to meet you, Clary," he said cheerfully before practically skipping out of the building. Jace looked back at Clary with a slightly apologetic expression but Clary couldn't help but smile, feeling a lot less apprehensive since seeing the small exchange. "Bye!" Max called over his shoulder as he headed back out of the house, leaving just Clary and Jace behind in the kitchen. Clary watched him go before looking back, sucking in the corner of her lower lip as she met Jace's eyes.

He looked completely fresh faced, wearing a pair of sweatpants and and a loose grey shirt, and his scent was coming off him in waves, not covered up by any cologne or deodorant, emphasized by the fact that he had been running and his blood was pumping a little faster through his veins.

"So..." Jace began slowly and Clary was relieved when she detected just the slightest tremor in his voice, giving away that he was just as nervous as she was.

"So..." she returned with a tight smile before looking down. They fell quiet again and when Clary looked around, searching for something to say. "How long have you been working on this place?" Jace turned and took a few steps through to the area that was probably meant to be the dining room, his fingers trailing over a door that was balanced over two saw benches that he had been sanding down, and shrugged a shoulder.

"I think a couple of years?" He replied idly. "I mean, this place has been here for years—this property was my mothers families, before she and my father got together, and she moved to be with him. But she was the only one left in her family so the property was left to her, and we would come out here a lot when I was younger, and she would bring out Alec and Izzy as well, we would all play around here, at the main house and at this one as well. I moved out here a couple of years ago, although I was only here part time, really, because I still spent a lot of time at my dads place since he was...Still my Alpha," Jace's voice sounded smaller and he shrugged a shoulder, and Clary could smell the sadness in the air.

She had met Stephen a couple of times, the first being the afternoon that Jace had killed her father, and the others had all been brief and she really hadn't been interested in talking to him.

He'd died just over thirteen months ago.

It would be...Thirteen months and five days now.

Because when he had died, Jace had inherited the Alpha spark, and their bond had suffered more, since that was when an Alpha needed his mate the most. Clary had been dealing with the pain of being separated from her mate for years, and while it meant that sometimes she couldn't sleep and sometimes she had bouts of nausea, but she managed her pain and after meeting Simon, he had helped her a lot. But once Jace had become an Alpha, _that_ was when things had gotten so much worse.

"I'm sorry...About what happened," Clary said softly, not reaching out and touching Jace, like she would have with another werewolf that she was close to. As werewolves they were immune to a lot of illnesses and physical harm. They couldn't catch a cold or an STD and when they were hurt, their bones could knit themselves back together within a day and their skin could close up with an hour or so. But there were some diseases that they could develop, and they presented differently because werewolves anatomy was different from humans.

Luke had called Clary and told her what had happened, his voice soft and empathetic as he had explained the situation over the phone. Stephen had been sick for a while, apparently, over a year, and had been keeping it from nearly everyone, although his pack had been picking up on things, especially Jace. The more time that had gone on, the more the pack had known that something was _wrong_ , because they could smell the sickness on his body, but they had sought treatment in secret, not wanting to expose the weakness of their pack. He had frontotemporal dementia, which humans could live with for years, sometimes, but it had been aggressive with Stephen, and his body had begun shutting down. Luke had explained that Stephen had apparently been slipping and getting worse; acting rash, lashing out, forgetting things—this was all what Jace had told Stephen only recently, because he was the closest Alpha living near to them. Jace hadn't been sure what he was going to do, because a werewolf as powerful as his father couldn't just be left to his own devices, and apparently they had had healers and warlocks examine him and there was no way to heal him.

Clary hadn't known what to do with the information when Luke had called her, and she had wondered if she should reach out to Jace. She'd gotten stupidly drunk on some wolfsbane alcohol that Simon had in stock, and had passed out for nearly twenty-four hours, and then when she had woken up, she had missed calls from Luke and her mother, even from Catarina, who hated using modern technology. When she had called them back, she found out that Stephen had committed suicide, overdosing on a pure silver concoction, probably to take the choice out of his sons hands—so that he didn't need to be the one to kill him and diffuse the threat.

"Did you want to run?" Jace asked after clearing his throat. Clary glanced down at what she was wearing, which wasn't really something she would usually run in. Jace realized what she was thinking and he looked toward another door. "There'll be some clothes in there from one of the girls, and maybe some shoes?" Clary nodded, the idea of a run appealing, even if she was going to be in someone elses clothes and wrapped in their scent.

"Yeah," Clary nodded, giving him a small smile, thinking that maybe it would be easier to talk once she had gotten rid of the pent up energy. "Yeah, okay."

 **Songs that I recommend are _Die A Little_ by Yungblud, _Teeth_ by 5SOS, _Love Myself_ by Olivia O'Brien and _Middle Finger_ by Bohnes, all of which have just been on repeat for the past week or so. Also, my husband is completely obsessed with _Motivation_ by Normani and _Slide Away_ by Miley Cyrus, so I've been hearing those a lot recently as well. Lol.**

 **I've been fighting this cold/flu/virus things for moooonths now, and I took a day off work coz it hit hard and I was feeling sorry for myself and I just spent it watching fluffy movies that make me happy. Haha. _Footloose_ , the original one, of course, even though I don't mind the new one. _A Cinderella Story, Ever After, Raise Your Voice, Centre Stage: Turn It Up, What A Girl Wants, The Prince & Me, 13 Going On 30 _and _High School Musical_ so those are my recommendations!**

 **Okay, so questions—how many of you guys are planning on getting Disney+? Haha. It's just been announced that it _will_ be getting released in New Zealand, which we were worried it wouldn't be because so many streaming services aren't. But it's gonna be here in November and me and my partner are _psyched_! Haha.**

 **Is everyone else heartbroken about the Sony/Marvel breakdown? Honestly, my heart goes out to Tom Holland the most, because he has done such an incredible job. There's always going to be a special place in my heart for the OG Spiderman, but there's just something about Tom's version, he was fucking amazing and had so much heart, and I'm just _so upset_ that there isn't going to be more of him in this verse. He seemed so heart broken at D23. Poor baby :(**

 **Last one! Anyone watch performances at the VMAs? I honestly kind of think the VMAs/Oscars/The Golden Globes yadda yadda yadda are pretty bullshit, pretty biased, so I don't pay too much attention to the nominations and the winners, but I live for the outfits and the, like, two or three performances from artists I like. Lizzo and Missy Elliott were fucking _amazing_ , and I screamed when Alyson Stoner came out on stage. Miley Cyrus' performance was totally heart breaking, so fucking good. And Halsey and Jonathan Van Ness were my stand out outfits! Oh also—Joe and Nick Jonas and Sophie Turner's reactions to Camila Cabello and Shawn Mendes not kissing in their set was fucking hilarious. Let's face it, I think anything involving Sophie is hilarious—did you guys see her pasta related Instagram story? Ahahahaha. She's amazing.**

 **Drop a review, let me know what you think, love you lots x**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey, guys! Before getting into it, I want to recommend some of my favourite songs as of late... _Undrunk_ by Fletcher. _Dance Monkey_ by Tones and I. And then of course _Kill My Mind_ by the beautiful Louis Tomlinson and _Lights Up_ by the just as beautiful Harry Styles, although the _Lights Up_ music video was an experience and a half, especially while high. _Pretending_ and _Honest_ by Mali Koa are just beautiful. Then _Promise Me_ by Badflowers, which...Made my heart hurt when I heard the song, and then when I watched the video, I cried for the next hour. Yeah. I just wanted to share some happy things, since my note down the end isn't as happy, I guess. Anyway. On with the story x**

Right now, literally the only thing that wasn't perfect was the fact that Clary was wearing clothes and shoes that weren't hers. They were clean, and they clearly hadn't been worn too many times, but she could still smell Maia on the sweatpants and singlet that she was wearing, and that grated a little at her insides, and the shoes were Isabelle's, but thankfully the smell of grass and dirt covered most of that up.

But other than that, the wind in her hair, Jace a few steps away from her, adrenaline pumping as they ducked and wove, she felt the best that she had in _years_.

She was pretty sure that Jace was holding back a bit, given he was an Alpha, so would naturally be faster than her, but then it also felt as though she was moving quicker than she ever had before. There was this energy pulsing between them that just seemed to make her run faster, and more agile, and it was like there was this invisible string that was tying them together, because when Jace seemed to make the decision to change their path a little, Clary was already turning in that direction, not needing him to call out and let her know that they were shifting off to the right.

The forest around here was different from the one around Luke's house, and where Clary had grown up. The trees were gathered more densely, but there were obvious paths that were broken by the pack who clearly ran them a lot. The smell of the ocean was also a lot sharper, the salt heavier in the air, and just the smell of dampness in the air in general, so she was guessing there was also a pond or a stream nearby, because she could hear it closer than the ocean was.

She wasn't even thinking about where they were going, or how long they were running for.

Her head just felt clear and her body felt free and her wolf was _singing_ , practically howling in happiness behind her rib cage as she just _ran_ , trusting Jace.

It must have been over an hour before they started slowing down, and Clary's thighs were burning in the best possible way. In the city, it wasn't really like she could push herself and her wolf to its limits, so she was definitely feeling it now, and it was a pleasant ache in her limbs even though she knew that it would all heal and pass very soon. Jace slowed right down, pushing through some trees and then stepping out to where it was suddenly clear, and there were smooth rocks and sand and a stream trickling.

"Shit," Clary breathed out as she wiped a hand over her face, wishing that she had a tie for her hair to keep it lifted off the nape of her neck. Jace looked over at her, and he wasn't smiling, but his expression was _happy_ and _open_ , and she was pleased to see that his cheeks were a little flushed as well, and he looked a bit sweaty, unlike how he had looked after running with Max.

"Did you want to walk in the water? It's pretty shallow here, and it leads out to the beach," Jace told her as he kept walking toward the stream.

"Yeah," Clary nodded and followed him. Part of her wondered if she should take off the shoes and socks that she was wearing, because they were going to get wet once they walked in the stream, and the water would feel _so good_ against her bare feet and around her ankles, but then she would be stuck carrying the shoes and socks and trying to put them back on when she had wet feet and had to head back to Jace's place, so she left them on.

They walked in silence for a while, Clary looking around at the new scenery and the scents that were swirling around them, but the strongest one was definitely coming from the Alpha who was walking alongside her, and the whole _point_ of coming here today was to talk, so she took in a deep breath and tilted her head as she looked across at him.

"So..." she began tentatively. Jace looked back at her, and it was clear that he was being careful about what he was choosing to say, because his mouth moved to form a few words before he actually said anything.

"Did you want me to start? Or did you want to?" He finally decided to go with and Clary chewed at the corner of her bottom lip before nodding a few times.

"Can I?" She asked and he nodded in agreement. She was glad that they were still moving, because it meant that she had other things that she could focus on, but she could smell the slight shift in Jace's scent, curiosity and relief. "Um..." she took in a deep breath, and reached back a hand to scratch the back of her neck, and then she blinked as she smelt the change in Jace's scent again, something soothing. It was more than a scent as well, it was something in their connection that Jace was giving off, trying to help calm her down, nothing too intrusive because their bond obviously wasn't very strong, but it was definitely working, and she felt her heartbeat slow back down. "How much do you know about my father?" She asked, glancing over at him. Jace's jaw clenched and his eyebrows pulled together and Clary immediately felt a wave of anger come off him. He was clearly trying to suppress it, but it was there.

"I know a bit," he said slowly. "I heard things, after... _After_ ," he decided to go with. "Obviously when your pack needed to speak with the Institute and then when began to rebuild with Luke as the Alpha, I heard things through my father, and then from Luke. But...I would rather hear them from you." Clary nodded a few times, and her mouth felt dry as she tried to swallow.

"I...Never realized that my father was a bad Alpha," Clary began quietly. "I mean, not for a long time. I mean, I definitely realized that he was an asshole, but I just thought that maybe I thought that because he was my _father_ , you know, so it was just...Everyone gets pissed off at their dad, right? He was strict, but I thought that that was just him," Clary made a face and rolled her shoulder, fingers twitching at her sides, and she could feel that Jace had take a step closer to her, not getting too far into her space that she felt crowded, just enough that she felt comforted. "I knew that him and my mum fought, but I never knew how bad things were. I had never been around other werewolves, other packs, and I didn't know that was unusual until later. Until after." She had been thinking about this talk for a while now, she'd known that it was going to have to happen and she had been preparing for it in the back of her head for the past few years, but it all sounded like a mess, now that it was coming out. None of it was structured and it was frustrating, because she didn't want to get emotional, she just wanted to get everything out there, because her and Jace needed that.

"Take a breath, if you need to," Jace said quietly, and as soon as her headed lifted and looked at him, he cringed a little, as though he thought that maybe he had been condescending and crossed a line, but it was her turn to take a step closer, the gap between them lessening so that there was only a couple of inches between their shoulders.

"Whenever my father hurt my mum, or my brother, or someone in my pack...Or me," she heard a sharp intake of breath from Jace, and that smell of anger again, one that he wasn't able to suppress. "Whenever it happened, it would be when he said we had done something wrong. And I genuinely thought that he was right. He was my Alpha and my father and everything in me wanted to make him happy and do what he wanted me to do, and so when he was telling me that I was being hurt only because I was doing something wrong, I believed him, you know?"

"Mm," Jace grunted quietly, because he completely disagreed, but there wasn't much else he could say.

"I thought some things in our pack were strange but...I didn't realize how weird they were. How _fucked_ up they were," her words were getting angrier, coming out quicker. "That my father just enjoyed being an Alpha because he enjoyed being in charge and having people do whatever he wanted them to. That he enjoyed the power that came with it. It wasn't about _loving_ and _caring_ for his pack—for us. And when Luke came back into the picture—they had been friends when they were younger, when my mum and father had first met and before he was an Alpha, it just got worse. Me and Jonathan—my brother—we actually blamed Luke for a few years. Because it was after he got there that things got worse. That our mum got hurt more and that my dad was even crazier than normal. But...I mean, obviously it wasn't Luke's fault. I _know_ that now, and I _knew_ that a while ago, but not when I was a kid and I was watching my mum get broken down. It feels shit to know that me and Jonathan treated Luke as though he was the problem, when he had really just come to join a pack with someone he thought was his friend, and then stayed because he knew that something was wrong."

"I'm sure Luke understood," Jace murmured and Clary nodded.

"Yeah, he did, because he's amazing," Clary flashed a tight smile across at him, obviously trying to lighten the mood. "Before you came, before that afternoon where you showed up...My father had never been blatantly violent toward me. Not _outright_ , anyway. I mean, he was rough when we were meant to be training, but I thought that was normal, but that afternoon that you came over...None of us knew that mum had gone to the coven of witches to ask them for help, so we didn't know why my father suddenly came home and was in such a terrible mood, but he had found out somehow. He just went after my mum and just—he looked like he was going to _kill_ her. He _was_ going to kill her," Clary gritted her teeth together, and her hands were clenched into fists. "It's the only time I had ever gone against him, and he just _threw me_ , as though I was nothing, and— _I_ would have been killed if you hadn't shown up. My mum would have been too."

She wasn't exaggerating.

Jace knew that.

He could still vividly remember the horrible crunching noise that her body had made when she had hit the tree, her petite body had crumpled to the ground in a broken heap, and she had lost consciousness shortly after Jace and Stephen had arrived. Her spine had been broken and she'd had a concussion, and even with the speed of healing that came with being a werewolf, she would never have healed fast enough to get away from her father if he had come back after her. It had taken her _days_ to recover, which was a long time for a werewolf, even if it was something that a normal human would potentially have never recovered from.

And her mum, who had been the direct target of Valentines anger, she would _definitely_ have been killed.

"I don't ever want you to think I'm not appreciative for you saving us, for saving me," Clary finally breathed out heavily, stopping in the water and turning to look at Jace, and she was embarrassed that she could feel tears stinging at the corners of her eyes. "Because I am. I really am," her voice had a high pitched twinge to it, one of distress, because she _knew_ that she had a lot to make up to Jace, and _they_ had a lot to make up for, and Jace's eyebrows pulled together as he reached out for her, a hand wrapping around her fist and squeezing at it, not particularly lightly, obviously trying to help calm her down. "And I just—I had dealt with being under an Alpha's command for _so_ many years, my _entire_ life—and I hadn't even realized how badly I had been treated, how badly my family and pack had been treated. And then you were _there_ straight away, and I just—" her breathing was coming out quickly and Jace took her other hand and squeezed that one as well.

"Clary," he said gently. "We're just talking. That's all, okay? Just talking." Her tears felt glassy and there was the scent of distress in the air, and it looked as though Jace wanted to wrap his arms around her, and part of her _wanted_ that, because Jace was her mate and he wanted to comfort her, but she was glad when he didn't. She felt some more calming waves come through their bond though, and that helped.

"I just—I wasn't ready to have someone else have some sort of _claim_ over me. We didn't _know_ each other. My father was dead. And then my brother took off a-and you know what happened to him, right?" Jace nodded slowly, not caring that there was running water around there ankles and they were now stopped in the middle of the stream. "He was older than me and he...He _needed_ an Alpha, and so he just clung to the first one that he found." Jace had heard this from Luke, in the years that they had gotten close. He had never heard Jocelyn mention Jonathan Morgenstern—or Fray, if he had changed his last name to his mothers maiden name, like Clary had—though he had seen photos of the two siblings in the Greymark pack home. "And that Alpha was a _fucker_ as well," she growled, sudden anger coming over her again, changing from the sadness that had been there before. "And he took advantage of Jon, until Jon didn't think that he could make any Alpha happy and...It drove him fucking mad."

The Alpha that Jonathan had found had been a rogue Alpha, not one with a pack already. He hadn't been particularly interested in having a pack either, but there were advantages at running with another werewolf. And even for rogues, there were still pulls to having a companion, to being tactile, and obviously that Alpha had found that in Jonathan. But he had never been an Alpha of anyone else, and he had been by himself for so long, and he had forced Jonathan to isolate himself from his family and the pack that he had grown up with. He just wanted to make his new Alpha happy, and that meant doing things that he had never been prepared to do before, such as killing other supernatural creatures. The new Alpha warped his view and in the end, both the Alpha and Jonathan had been killed by some seelie soldiers, after they had killed a seelie prince.

"I _know_ you're not like that now," Clary met Jace's eyes and squeezed his hands firmly back. "I know that you're not going to do anything like that—especially now, when I've heard things about you as an Alpha, and I've seen you with your pack. It's just...At the time, all I knew was that my Alpha had just died, and suddenly my mate was there, and I just...I _couldn't_ let myself be caught again. Not so quickly."

It stung to hear that.

It hurt Jace's wolf to hear that Clary viewed their relationship, their bond, as being _caught_.

He knew what she meant, but it still pained him.

"Sorry," Clary added quietly, and she could obviously feel the hurt coming off him in waves. He forced a small smile and nodded at her, but they didn't say anything for a few beats. "Just after my father and after Jon...I _needed_ to be by myself. I couldn't let myself be tied to someone else so tightly again so soon, and I knew that you were going to be an Alpha one day because of your dad, and...I _know_ that it was selfish, because it wasn't just myself that my decision was effecting, I just really needed to _breathe_ and know who I was, and if I _had_ stayed here, years ago, I would never have been truly happy with myself, and with you." Jace watched her with careful eyes, not interrupting her, even though she was rambling a bit now. Once she cut herself off, pressing her lips together, Jace gave her another small smile.

"Do you want to keep walking?" He prompted her and Clary nodded. He let go of one of her hands, but kept holding onto the other as they moved to walk side-by-side. It was a few minutes before he spoke. "I didn't know who you were when we were driving to speak with your father. I just...I knew you were my mate once we got onto the property, I could smell you, I could feel you, and I knew that you were in trouble," he winced as he looked down, and Clary closed the gap between them all together, bumping her shoulder against his. "I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. I-I _killed_ someone," he swallowed hard, throat clicking. "I had never even really _hurt_ anyone before then, but I had _killed_ someone that day, and honestly, I would all over again, after seeing you the you did that day." He glanced over at Clary, and there was an understanding expression on her face. "I wasn't even thinking when I saw you on the ground, all I knew was that you were hurting and I had to stop it." Clary's hand tightened around his, her fingers shifting, sliding between his. "And I—" he broke off for a moment and let out a heavy breath through his nose. "And it was shit. It's _been_ shit," the honesty in his voice struck a chord deep inside Clary, and her wolf whined at the sound.

"Jace..." she murmured and she felt him draw himself back together in response.

"I know that you had dealt with a lot growing up—that you lost so much and were treated in a way that _no one_ deserves to be treated—by a parent _or_ an Alpha," Jace told her carefully. "It took me a while to learn a lot of things, and even then, it wasn't everything, because obviously, no one else can tell me exactly what _you've_ been through. But...I can't say that it didn't hurt that nothing I knew about you over the years came from _you_. And when you moved to New York, not long after we met, after you graduated high school, that distance was...Painful as fuck, in all honesty." Clary flinched, feeling those words hit her directly in the chest. "And after my dad died...After I became an Alpha, it was even harder. And I think...I _know_ , actually," he let out out another breath, this one a bit harsher than the other. "It built up some resentment, you not being here."

Their fingers loosened a little, not as tight as they were before, but they were still walking shoulder-to-shoulder, and neither of them seemed ready to actually let go of one anothers hand, so that seemed like a good thing.

They kept walking until the woods broke and the stream started opening up, and then they had to move to the edges of the stream because it was getting deeper. They stopped moving side-by-side because they had to climb on some rocks that lined the stream, and Jace lead the way, their hands gripping one anothers a bit tighter again. Both of them were moving confidently, sure of themselves on the rocks even though they were slippery, light on their feet. Then the treeline broke completely and there was sand stretching out in front of them and the ocean was beautiful in front of them.

"I'm sorry," Clary said as they stood in the sand. "I'm sorry about...Doing that to you. And not—I'm ju-just sorry about how I handled it. All of it. Everything," her voice was coming out almost wet from her throat, and she wanted to swallow hard, but her nose was itchy and her skin felt really dry all of a sudden, and she was worried if she tried to clear her throat, tears might fall from her eyes. "I never wanted to hurt you, it was never about that."

"I know," Jace said simply, tugging on her hand so that they were walking toward the water. They kept on walking, until their toes were right where the smallest waves were eating up the sand. "You want to swim?" Jace asked, glancing toward her, and there was a small smile on his face, obviously trying to tell her that it was okay.

"It'll be cold," Clary scrunched up her nose as she looked down at the water, even though their bodies would regulate their temperature quickly.

"What—that scare you?" Jace's smile grew a bit more as he stepped into the water, still completely clothes and shoed.

"Yes," Clary couldn't stop herself from responding, even though her voice was too sincere to be an answer to whether she was scared of the ocean. Jace heard that, and he jerked his head in a nod.

"Me too," he murmured, before he lunged forward, grabbing her around the waist, and marching her into the deeper water, despite her surprised laugh.

 **Alright, so, obviously I didn't update last month. My bad. I'm in a pretty shitty spot, to be honest, mentally and physically and I've just got a lot going on right now. I'm still dealing with the abrupt loss of a family member and the fall out of that on my family and recently my husband has had a colleague take his life, which has brought up a lot for him. We're going to be okay, we're dealing with things, but I just need to take a breath right now. When I am in front of my computer and I'm actually focused enough to write, I'm not sticking to the schedules that I had before and I'm just writing what I really feel like which unfortunately hasn't been these stories. So I'm just...Gonna take a step back for a bit.**

 **You guys are all beautiful, and I'll be back soon, I just need a bit of a breather to re-centre myself.**

 **Since updating last, it has been World Coming Out Day and World Mental Health Day and I just wanted to say to anyone dealing with mental health issues and anyone in the LGBTQ+ community, whether you are out and loud or still processing things internally, you are all beautiful and deserve love and kindness. Just because I'm going to be away for a little bit, doesn't mean I'm unreachable, feel free to message me on my socials or on here if anyone ever wants to just chat, even if it's just about movies or songs, we all need to look after ourselves first, and then one another.**

 **Much love xx**

 **Tumblr: SereneCalamity**  
 **Twitter: CalamitySerene**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey, beauties :)**

By the time Jace and Clary got back to the house, their clothes had mostly dried off, although there was still an uncomfortable feeling of wet socks and shoes. Her hair was a complete mess and it was going to take her a solid hour to drag a brush through it, and her feet were probably going to smell from being in the wet shoes so she was going to have to wash them well when she got back to Luke's. Clary couldn't bring herself to care though, because she felt the best that she had felt in too long and she could feel that Jace was the same.

Their bond was pulsing and her wolf was practically purring and the weight on her shoulders just felt as though it was gone.

The werewolves had only been in the water for a short while, not really long enough for their bodies to adapt to the temperature, even though that would only have taken a couple of minutes. Jace had dropped her into the water and Clary had gasped in surprise, heaving in a breath before she had lunged at him and wrestled him under a wave. He could have put up more of a fight, but he hadn't, and they had both sunk back under the water, Clary's body suspended above his, and his fingers had reached out and were gently touching her hips, and it hadn't felt as though she was tied to him by a leash or a chain, it felt as though they were connected by a swaying thread that had some give, enough to make sure she didn't feel restrained.

They had gotten out of the water almost immediately after, and they had run all the way back, no being anywhere near as careful as they should have been on the slippery rocks that lined the stream, but as werewolves, they knew that they would heal fast if they got hurt, and they were sure-footed as they ran over the rocks, hands gripped together.

"Did you want to change?" Jace asked as they stepped back into the barn house. "I don't have the plumbing or anything all hooked up for a shower, but there will be some towels around if you want to dry off." Clary couldn't help but smile, because the absolute _last_ thing that she wanted right now was wash off the smell of salt and fresh air and _happiness_ and maybe a little bit of her mate off her skin.

"Just a towel, that'd be fine," Clary replied as she went to where she had folded her clothes and put the boots that she had come in, picking them up and following slowly after Jace as he went into the next room. Jace had a few things in the room which looked like it would maybe be the master once it was done, because it was big with an en-suite and had big double windows already installed, even if the frame wasn't finished yet. "This place looks like it's going to be beautiful when you're done," she commented as he picked up a towel from a pile of them on a chair, holding it out to her.

"I hope so," Jace commented idly as she took the towel. "You can just get dressed in here."

"Thanks," she flashed him a small smile and Jace stepped out of the room, closing the door behind him to give her some privacy. She had dried off a little on their run back, especially her hair, so she didn't take long once she undressed to towel herself off and change back into the clothes that she arrived in, although of course her bra and underwear were still damp underneath. Clary scrubbed the towel through her long hair as she walked over to re-open the door. "What did you want me to do with the wet clothes?" She asked, head turning in the direction of where she could hear Jace moving, although she couldn't see him. He appeared a moment later with two apples in his hand, the other hand extended.

"I can take them," he said. "I'll hang them over the railing so they can dry."

"I can do it," Clary raised an eyebrow at him with a smile and walked around his outstretched hand, heading through the open sliding door and onto the deck. She hung the clothes over the wooden railing, spreading them out so that they had a better chance of drying, and she could feel Jace's movements behind her more than she could hear him, given how quietly he seemed to move. There was a tap against her bicep and when she tilted her head down, she saw one of the apples that Jace had been holding, and she took it from him, turning back to him and taking a bite.

"Do you want to sit down?" Jace asked, nodding at the steps and Clary agreed, sitting down and turning her body half around so that she was leaning against the wooden railing behind her and facing him partially with a tilt of her head. Jace sat on the other side of the top step, leaning against the other railing, but he wasn't _that_ far away, and his leg was stretching out, only a couple of inches away from hers.

"Thanks," Clary tipped the apple at him before taking another bite, and Jace just smiled. They fell quiet as they ate, just looking out over the grass around the barn house and the woods beyond that. "So you said that this was your mums place, right? But you didn't live here when you growing up? I can still feel you here, though. I can—I mean, it feels like you here. Not just you _now_ ," she scrunched up her nose at that, as though she didn't quite understand what she was saying, but Jace smiled easily.

"Yeah," he answered softly. "The main house was where my mum grew up, where her family lived. This barn house has been here since before she was born, but no one had really done anything with it in years. When I became Alpha, I decided that I needed to start over somewhere, I needed my own space to grow and develop and I think that those who chose to stay in my pack did as well." Clary was watching him carefully, nose twitching a little as she chewed on a mouthful of apple. "My mum used to bring me out here when we were younger, and after she died, Maryse used to still bring me and Alec and Izzy out here to see my grandparents. It was too painful for my father to come out here, in a place where _everything_ was overrun by the scent of my mother." Jace's words were even, although his scent was tinged with sadness, an old sadness that had been accepted a long time ago. "They left everything to my mother, and she left everything to me, so it just made sense for me to move here after my father passed. It had always been like a second home to me." Clary nodded and took another bite of her apple, not sure what to say. They were quiet for a while before Jace pulled his fingers through his hair. "Your friend from New York has arrived," he said, as a statement, not a question, changing the topic. Clary blinked at the shift and then quickly swallowed her mouthful.

"He has," she replied. "It's good having him here. He's helped me a lot over the years, he's my best friend," she couldn't help but smile. "I don't think Luke was quite prepared to have him in the house—he talks a lot."

"Adds to a home," Jace murmured and Clary smile grew, even though she felt her cheeks warm.

"Yeah, it does," she nodded, because it was true. "Although, Luke's pack is a bit older than your pack, I think." Clary's eyes narrowed slightly as she thought. "I mean, not that I _know_ all of your pack, but just the ones I've met." There was a shift in the scent from Jace that Clary really didn't want to think about right now, so she didn't, taking another bite of her apple.

"What do you do in New York?" Jace asked and Clary glanced at him in surprise, because it was such a _normal_ question. It was a question that people asked when trying to get to know someone, to become friends, and it felt easy.

"I have a degree in Communications and Public Relations, which is kind of ironic, given I try to avoid talking face to face with people in my job as much as possible," Clary grinned as she made herself more comfortable, sliding down a bit lower on the wooden step, and her leg slipped a bit closer to Jace's, their ankles brushing together. "I didn't know what my endgame, or whatever, was when I first went to college, and so I got partway through a couple of courses and then changed my mind a few times before I finally settled on this, but I actually really like it. I work for a bit event planning company, and I do most of the background stuff, which means I don't have to deal with clients directly as much."

"Do you work with anyone like us?" Jace asked, looking curious, and Clary shook her head, nose wrinkling a little.

"All humans," she replied. "There was someone in the same building as me who was _something_ else, but I never worked out what. I think they might have been seelie, or had seelie blood in them, but they were only there for a couple of months when I first started." She tilted her head to the sides a few times. "Sometimes I think it would be easier if I _did_ work with people who were like us, it _definitely_ means that there would be some more respect for things that we could hear and smell—" there was a laugh from Jace at that. "But it's okay. I like it. And there are others outside of work that are like me. Us."

"Yeah?" Jace prompted gently.

"Yeah," Clary nodded. "I mean, there's Si. He's a warlock, which you know."

"The one that you said was 'totally harmless'," Jace commented with an amused, arched eyebrow that Clary knew was asking for more information, because _no_ warlock was 'totally harmless'.

"He wouldn't hurt me, or anyone who meant anything to me," Clary told him. "And he knows who you are to me, who your..." Clary couldn't help but trail off and frown for a moment, and she moved her leg back, tucking it underneath her so that her ankle was no longer against Jace's, and she tried to ignore the way her wolf immediately started whining at the loss of contact. "Who your pack are to me. I mean, _totally harmless_ wasn't quite the right way to describe it, but..."

"It's okay," Jace shot her a small smile. "I trust your judgement." Clary's chest tightened for a moment as their eyes met, and her wolf settled a bit in her chest, happy at the acknowledgement from the Alpha, before she dropped her eyes again.

"When it's the full moon, I'll run with Gabriel and his pack. They're the biggest New York pack, Luke is friends with him and he made sure that they were looking out for me when I first went there. It's not—it's not the same as running with _my_ pack, but it's still good," Clary trailed off again, because technically, Jace's pack was _her_ pack. As an Alpha and as her mate, she would eventually be expected to join his pack, to leave the pack she had grown up in—even though it had morphed into something different than what she had actually grown up with—and become part of the Herondale pack. "Um, and there's Raph as well. He's a vampire." There was another arched eyebrow from Jace and Clary couldn't stop a short laugh. "Yeah, I know, but he's been incredible. Him and Simon are friends, although Si is a lot younger than him."

"He's the one we could smell in your apartment?" Jace asked and Clary nodded slowly, hoping that he wasn't about to ask more about her relationship with Raphael, because that would get uncomfortable. "I'm glad you have people watching your back out there, Clary," he said quietly, which caught her off guard and made her face him.

"Yeah, I do," Clary nodded and she smiled across at him. "But, I mean..." her smile changed to something more intimate. "There's nothing like being home, you know?"

"I know," Jace nodded and he extended his leg further, like a question. Clary's eyes were drawn to his leg, which was now a lot closer to her, and she didn't unfold her legs like they were before, so that their ankles were brushing, but she leaned forward and braced her arm against the deck, and her forearm was pressed against the outside of her leg. She felt the warmth, and she felt the tingles run through her body at the close contact, and part of her wanted to look up at Jace and see if he felt the same way that she did, but she forced herself not to, looking out toward the forest.

"So...Alec, is he actually your second?" Clary asked, hoping that her question didn't come off as offensive, so she spoke carefully. "I mean, I know he's your cousin, and you guys are obviously close from what I've heard—and from what I've seen—but there's just...I don't know." She sucked her lower lip into her mouth, and nibbled at the bottom of the apple core before putting it down on the deck. "Maia just has a certain power about her," she shrugged as she glanced over at Jace, and she was surprised when she saw him looking back at her with an almost _proud_ smile on his face.

"A lot of people think that Alec is my second," Jace told her. "And I guess in some ways he is. Most packs have a clear second-in-command. But I—" he pursed his lips and shrugged a shoulder. "But Alec and Maia both act as my second." Clary's met Jace's eyes at that, because she had never heard of that before. There was an Alpha, and then an Alpha's mate who held a position almost equivalent to that of the Alpha, and then there was a second.

"Why?" Clary asked, and her voice was a bit stronger now, since it seemed as though Jace was open to discussing the intricacies of his pack. Jace smiled again, and he twisted around, leg pressed firmly against her arm.

"Alec and I grew up together. We are both born werewolves, our parents are werewolves who were all part of the same pack, so we learnt together, we shifted within the first year of full moons together, we fought together, we shared the same pains and joys as we grew up," he told her, and his voice was easy, the trust clear, which made Clary's wolf practically _purr_ inside her ribs. "I always knew that I was going to be Alpha, _eventually_ , although I never knew—I didn't know how soon it would be," his tone dropped for a moment and Clary knew that it had been a heavy day for both of them, and he was thinking about his father again. "But my wolf always knew that it was going to be Alec by my side. I trust him with everything I have."

"But then Maia came along..." Clary prompted him with a slight smirk.

"Maia is different from Alec. Alec thinks about things logically and carefully, he balances me out well, because sometimes I have the tendency to just—run straight into the middle of situations," he let out a rueful smile. "I'm not so bad now, but I was when I was younger. Maia reminds me a lot of who I used to be, and sometimes I still need that reminder. She's an incredible fighter, and she's smart and passionate, and her and Alec have a good bond. We make a good team. I'm really lucky to have them." Clary couldn't help her smile.

Jace spoke like a true leader, a good Alpha.

Clary had seen all signs of that today.

She couldn't help but lean in and share with him. They moved to lighter topics—Clary told Jace about some of the projects that she had worked on recently, and it had been surprisingly easy to tell him about the girl in her office who regularly had phone sex with her long distance boyfriend. Jace wrinkled his nose and let out a laugh that made Clary's shoulders feel loose. Jace told her about doing freelance architecture work, something that he had always planned on doing, even before he became an Alpha, and about a very _interesting_ couple who wanted lots of mirrored walls and sturdy posts to be placed throughout the house in specific places. She told him about a hybrid cat that she had come across on the last full moon who had hissed at her, and who she'd actually had a lot of fun chasing, and Jace told her about a time when he was in school where he nearly lost control because Isabelle told him that Dumbledore died before he had gotten to the end of the _Harry Potter_ books.

It felt easy and familiar, and it wasn't until Clary's phone vibrated with a message from Simon, asking how things were going and when she thought she'd be back that she realized that she'd been with Jace for nearly four hours.

"Shit," she blinked down at her phone and shook her head. "I didn't realize how long I'd been here."

"That's fine," Jace told her, and the wind was ruffling his hair and his contented scent made her nose flare and smile to herself. It was the first time that she actually let herself breathe it in and wash over her, the deep earthy tones mixed together with the dark chocolate scent that was _just_ on the right side of bitter made her shiver a little. She tried to cover it up by standing up and clearing her throat.

"I should probably head off," Clary told him, and Jace was on his feet before she was, extending a hand to her. Clary took it, letting him help her to a standing position, and after checking her pockets and making sure she had her things, they started walking toward her mums car.

There was still a lot up in the air.

There was still a lot that _wasn't_ discussed, in relation to where they stood and what their future was going to be.

But Clary felt as though what they had done today was a good step forward.

"I just...I wanted to say I'm sorry again," Clary's voice was quiet as she stood by the open drivers door of the car, eyebrows pulling together, and her eyes were glued to Jace's bare feet in the grass. "About your dad, and what you went through, and—and my part in it. Or my _lack_ of part in it, I guess." Jace didn't say anything, but his scent wasn't angry, and after a few beats passed, she lifted her chin and looked up at him and Jace was already reaching out for her. His hand was gentle, resting against the side of her neck, and her heartbeat that she hadn't even realized had quickened began to slow back down. He didn't say anything as he met her gaze, his fingers tightening just a little against the back of her neck before he leaned in and brushed his lips against her cheek before he took a step back. Clary swallowed hard as his hand left her neck, falling back to his side, and she knew that he was watching the way her eyes were tracking his hand and it made her face heat up.

She gave him a quick smile and got in her car, and as she drove away, she could see that he was still standing there and watching her until she disappeared down the driveway and into the trees.

 **So obviously it's been a while, and there's a lot of songs that I haven't recommended! I've just decided to log into that website thing that shows your top tracks, so these are my short term top ten. 1) _She_ \- Harry Styles. 2) _Radio_ \- Lana Del Rey. 3) _Living Proof_ \- Camila Cabello. 4) _Hazel_ \- Carlie Hanson. 5) _September Song_ \- JP Cooper. 6) _We Made It_ \- Louis Tomlinson. 7) _All My Friends_ \- AJ Mitchell. 8) _The Sound_ \- The 1975. 9) _Wrong Direction_ \- Hailee Steinfield. 10) _Dazed & Confused_ \- Ruel. Bonus song would be _You Should Be Sad_ by Halsey, which is fucking amazing, so far my second favourite of the released tracks from Manic.**

 **There's been a lot of amazing TV shows that have recently come out; _The Witcher/His Dark Materials/Watchmen/The Mandalorian_. These are all amazing, incredible acting, the sets and scenery and costume design is just A+. Also _Spinning Out_ was really good, I absolutely loved Mandy and Marcus. I love when there are strong side characters that I can fall in love with, and it had good story lines.**

 **I've also been to a couple of concerts that were great; Greta Van Fleet, Ruel, Shawn Mendes and Khlaid. All bloody brilliant.**

 **Now. I don't want to say much about how shit 2020 has been because we're only 14 days in and holy shit, I feel like there's a lot going on. A fucking lot. For me, what hits closest to home is Australia on fire. On the fifth of January our skies turned an apocalyptic orange because the winds changed and the smoke reached us here in New Zealand. I just want to say to everyone who is dealing with anything right now—it doesn't matter how big or small—I love you and you're not alone x**

 **Tumblr: SereneCalamity**  
 **Twitter: CalamitySerene**


	11. Chapter 11

Jace was still working on the barn house as dusk fell, the sun sinking in the sky and the trees casting long shadows across the cleared out grassy area around the house, and the few lights that were set up in the house were turned on, exposed bulbs hanging down low from the ceiling as Jace finished sanding down a door frame and straightened up, the pain that had been gathering in his lower back quickly disappearing. He could hear a car approaching, but the smell was familiar and he didn't bother going to the door to greet the other werewolf as he picked up his phone to look at the time, seeing that it was a little after seven and he had a couple of messages from Isabelle and Maia, telling him that dinner was going to be ready soon.

"Well," Will commented as he stepped into the house and looked around with an exaggerated sniff. "It smells good in here." Jace narrowed his eyes as he looked over at his uncle, and he saw the wolfish grin on his face, before he looked back down at his phone and sent off a quick response in the group chat, saying he would be heading back up to the house shortly. "So I'm guessing that means that Miss Clarissa came by."

"She prefers Clary," Jace said shortly as he wiped his hands down on his shorts and then reached out to pick up the hoodie that he had been wearing that morning, slipping it on even though his temperature regulated easily with the cooling evening air. Maybe he was putting it on because the smell of Clary was clinging to his shirt and he wanted to keep it close to his chest, trapped against him and as far _away_ from Will as he could, even though logically he knew Clary's scent was in the house itself as well.

"I bet she does," Will grinned as he walked through the house and over to the kitchen, where the centre island was. It was all curved wood and elegant lines—the kitchen almost completely finished other than some painting and the finishing touches of the electricity and plumbing—and he lifted himself up, sitting on the island and swinging his legs.

"You're worse than Max," Jace huffed a little. "If Max was jumping up on the counter tops, he'd be getting a smack around the head." Will just wiggled his eyebrows and didn't say anything, adding to the reasons why he was the most frustrating member of Jace's pack. "What are you doing down here?"

"I can't check on my darling nephew?" Will asked with a tilt of his head and blinking his eyes in a way that was probably meant to come off as innocent but Jace just gave him a flat look because he knew Will better than that. "I knew that you were meeting with Clarissa today and I wanted to check in, see how it went."

"It went fine," Jace replied, words a bit clipped and Will didn't move from where he was sitting, other than swinging his legs a bit faster, and Jace sighed as he adjusted his hoodie and then walked over to his uncle, bracing his legs against the side of the wooden centre island, near Will. "It went really good, actually," he admitted quietly, and he couldn't help but smile, which got a huff of laughter from Will.

"Now that wasn't so hard, was it?" Will laughed. "Come on, tell me about her." And Jace sighed, and acted as though this was _difficult_ , even though if he was being honest, he really wanted to talk about her, about everything that he was feeling inside. With Alec and even Izzy, it might be difficult, because of how protective they were of Jace, and Alec had made no secret of how wary he was of Clary, and while Izzy was supportive, she was still nervous, and Jace could understand her reasons why. Maia was somewhere in the middle as well, wanting to support her Alpha, knowing how desperate the need to be with ones mate was, but she had also seen the way that Jace had struggled without Clary over the years and had heard how badly things had gone when they had first found each other.

"Right," Jace began and everything sort of just _spilled_ out. How _good_ it felt to be with her, how _well_ their wolves smelt together, how _perfect_ their bodies moved together when they had been running through the forest and then how _natural_ it had been to sit down afterwards, both of them a little sweaty so that their scents were twining together, and just talk for hours. Surprisingly, Will actually let him talk, didn't interrupt to make sarcastic comments like he usually did, and there was a gentle smile on his face, completely different from the smirk that he had been wearing earlier.

"I'm happy for you," Will said softly and for a moment, Jace felt guilty about gushing about Clary, even though Will had been the one to prompt him to talk. Will's mate had been a human, someone that he had met when he was a teenager. Jace had been young when they had first met, only seven or eight, and at the time, there was a lot that he didn't understand. He knew that his uncle had met his mate, and he knew that she wasn't a wolf but he didn't know what was happening behind all of the closed doors and the whispered conversations with adults. Later on, he had learnt that Will had wanted to change her, that he had begged for Stephen, his Alpha, to turn her into a werewolf, and for his brother, Stephen had agreed, even though he had his doubts, but the girl had been determined. Her body had rejected the bite, and she had died a few days later, and it had taken a long time for Will to recover.

Maybe he never had, because Jace couldn't _imagine_ surviving in a world where Clary was no longer living and breathing.

There had never been anyone else for Will, not even a fling or a one night stand that Jace had ever been able to smell on him.

"Don't do that," Will commented after the silence stretched between them, and Jace looked over at the older man, who was still looking at him with that same, gentle smile, one that actually looked a lot like his fathers, and Jace was surprised by how much the resemblance made his heart thud in his chest. "Don't feel bad about feeling happy."

"I don't," Jace said, even though he was lying, and Will definitely _heard_ the lie, but he didn't call him out on it.

"The thing that you _should_ be feeling bad about is Kaelie," Will's smile turned cheeky and Jace rolled his eyes, feeling steadier on his feet now that Will was back to being a jackass again, even though he was bringing up a good point. "Have you thought about what you're going to do with her?"

"What I'm going to _do_ with her?" Jace grunted, pushing away from the centre island and moving around the kitchen area, cleaning up even though he was pretty pedantic about cleaning up after himself anyway.

"You're going to have to tell Clarissa about her, and you're obviously going to have to tell Kaelie that's she's back, if she doesn't already know," Will continued, and he was swinging his legs again, the backs of his heels hitting the sturdy wood of the bottom of the island, and Jace _really_ wished that his glare worked as well on Will as it did on Max. "You can't go into this with any secrets, especially with the rocky road you and Clarissa have already been on since you two met, and Kaelie deserves an explanation, even though the girl isn't an idiot." Will tilted his head to the side and there was a glint in his eye that Jace _never_ liked. "You're both adults, it's not as though Clary will have been completely celibate and not sleeping with anyone. It's not something you should be ashamed of."

"I know," Jace muttered as he put all of the smaller tools back into the black and red toolbox and closed it up, trying to ignore the way his uncle's gaze was following him knowingly, and could undoubtedly pick up on the slightly soured smell that his scent had taken on at the idea of someone touching his mate intimately, even though he knew that he had no right to be jealous. Then he started absently pushing around the sheets that were on the ground with his feet, avoiding Will's eyes, making him feel like a kid having some serious talk with his parents.

"Kaelie's probably already heard that Clary is back," Will pointed out. "It's not like anyone in your pack is known for their subtlety." Jace looked up at that, and he rolled his eyes, but there was a small smile on his face.

" _Our_ pack," Jace corrected his uncle.

"Our pack," Will agreed, a put-upon expression on his face, as though it was _so hard_ being a part of their pack, even though Jace knew that he loved them all. "Even though you're all children and make my life a living hell." Jace rolled his eyes again, because _that_ statement was untrue, but he'd let him have it. "Anyway, I'm starving. You ready to stop moping around here and head up to the main house?"

"I wasn't moping," Jace sighed, because Will always made things into something that they weren't, but he snatched up his keys from where they were on the windowsill and lead the way out of the house, Will close behind him.

"You _were_ , but that's okay, nephew," Will caught up with him easily and threw an arm around his shoulders, tugging him in close and ruffling his hair in a way that he always used to do when he was young. Jace struggled away from him, needing to use some of his superhuman strength given the grip that Will had on him, and moved over to where his Camaro was parked. He usually didn't bring it down with him from the house, since it only took him thirty seconds or so if he was running from the house to the barn house, but he'd gone into town this morning to pick up a few things, and had just ended up parking it there until he headed up to the main house. "Now let's go see what food Izzy has cooked up to kill us all for dinner."

* * *

It had been almost five o'clock when Clary left Jace's property, but instead of driving directly back home, she took a more scenic route, taking roads that she hadn't been on since she was a teenager. She turned a playlist on her Spotify up loud, Astrid S and Fletcher and AURORA playing through the speakers as she took side roads to get her close to the beach and then chose to take a road that wound up the mountains and pulled off the side so that she could get out and look down at the waves crashing down on the rocks below, breathing in the salty air. Night was falling and the sun was sinking, and she could still smell Jace on her skin in a way that made her wolf settle happily inside of her, and she closed her eyes as she breeze stroked through her hair.

Things were still confusing, because her life was in New York, and there was only so long that she could put off going back there and working through things. She had a full time job, and she had friends and while she had always known that coming back to California _permanently_ was something that she had to do, it hadn't been something that she had planned for any time in the future. But now...Her and Jace seemed to have a real chance.

He was nothing like her father.

He was nothing like the Alpha she had feared he might be like.

And they'd already lost so much time, she didn't know if she could shoulder the responsibility of being the reason why they lost even _more_ time.

But right now, Clary's head felt...Pleasantly empty. It sounded a bit strange as she realized that that was what she was feeling, but for the first time in a long time, her thoughts were just at ease. While she knew that there were a lot of decisions that needed to be made, and a lot of things that her and Jace were going to need to talk about in the future, right now, in this moment, while staring out over the cliffs edge and down to the water that was crashing against the rocky cliff face.

She sat on the bonnet of her mums car for so long that when she reopened her eyes and focused properly, she realized that the sun had all but disappeared, and she must have been there for an hour or so. When she got back into the car, she had a message from Simon saying that he was back at the house, and he had thought that she would be back a while ago, one from her mother letting her know that dinner wasn't far away if she was going to be home for that, and then one from Jace, that had only come in about five minutes ago.

 ** _I really enjoyed today. I hope I can see you again soon._**

Clary smiled down at her phone, taking in a deep breath that she felt through each of her limbs, and her fingers came up to brush over the cheekbone that she still felt the phantom touch of Jace's lips from his earlier kiss. Her wolf was purring and preening inside her, and Clary took one more moment to herself to just breathe and smile before she plugged her phone back into the audio jack of the car and turned the engine back on, pulling out of the look out that she was parked in, and accelerating back toward Luke and her mothers home.

She made one last stop, though.

She hadn't thought that she would be stopping by this part of the forest again so soon since she had come here the first time after so many years, but there was something about everything that they had talked about today that had drawn her back to the place where her old, childhood home was.

Clary pulled up the car outside where she had just been running a few mornings ago, taking in a deep breath and waiting to feel _something_ wash over her that would send her stalking back to her car, but there wasn't anything. It wasn't like the times just after the _incident_ with her father and Jace had happened, and it wasn't like the other morning, when she just felt _resigned_ and _grudgingly accepting_ to what this area was.

This time she saw it as something else.

Tears started spilling down her cheeks before she could even stop them, before she had even really processed what was happening, and by the time she realized that they were making tracks down her cheeks, she didn't bother to lift her hands and brush them away, just letting them fall. She ended up sitting down on the ground, leaning against a fallen, mossy log, ignoring the smell of ash and soot that her nose could still pick up, buried beneath the soil from all those years ago, and she just let herself cry.

It felt cathartic.

The sobs were for the father she had never really had and had then lost.

And for the mate that she had found, and then subsequently lost, for so long.

For _her_ part in losing that mate, because of her own fears and insecurities, and the pain that she had caused not only to herself, but more importantly, to Jace.

Her wolf mourned with her, howling inside her chest, not bothering to try and muffle her sounds given she wasn't holed up in a tiny apartment with thin walls but instead in an open forest. When all the tears were gone, her shoulders felt lighter, and she was pretty sure if she was human, she would feel absolutely exhausted right now, rather than just slightly tired. Clary sat there for longer—long after the sun had completely gone down and the moon had lit up the sky—just breathing and staring up at the branches above her.

 **Okay, so my top songs this week are as follows;**

 **1) _Walls_ \- Louis Tomlinson. 2) _Alanis' Interlude_ \- Halsey and Alanis Morissette. 3) _Venice Bitch_ \- Lana Del Rey. 4) _Fake Love_ \- BTS. 5) _Too Young_ \- Louis Tomlinson. 6) _Always You_ \- Louis Tomlinson. 7) _Mikrokosmos_ \- BTS. 8) _Caught Up In Your Storm_ \- Mickey Guyton. 9) _8TEEN_ \- Khalid. 10) _Heebiejeebies_ \- Aminé and Kehlani.**

 **The song that my husband hasn't stopped playing is _Dionysus_ by BTS. We've been on a total BTS buzz lately, totally jumping on that train, even if we're a little late. My hubby's faves are Suga, Jungkook and Namjoon—he completely swoons everytime Suga comes on stage or starts rapping. Haha. Mine would be Namjoon, who I, admittedly, swoon over everytime he comes on screen, and then Jungkook, even if he's too pretty to even exist.**

 **In one of my reviews, _KnivesOut_ recomended _Anne With An E_ which I have actually watched before although I haven't finished yet, and I definitely want to recommend to you guys! I remember reading the books when I was younger and loving them, and there's just something about this series that has brought it all back. I've also started watching _Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood_ when me and my husband are high, and I'm super into it. Haha.**

 **I think my weekly updates are going to slow down a bit for a few weeks, although I think I had a good run! So I'll be doing previews of the next chapter if you leave a review and let me know if you want one or not.**

 **Also, feel free to hit me up on my socials;  
** **Tumblr: SereneCalamity  
** **Twitter: CalamitySerene**

 **xx**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey beautiful people :)**

 **Okay. So. I wanted to say something about everything that is going on rather than just make a few vague comments in my posts. The situation now deserves more than that, I think. Because things are hectic right now. Things are just a smidge crazy, you know? Umm...I get awkward in tense situations and it usually results in me laughing at the wrong time or needing to go and throw up, because I throw up when I'm anxious, and let me tell you, I throw up on average three times a week generally, and that is now a daily thing, so that's super cool! Anyway.**

 **Just thought I'd add in here, my husband and I woke up the other Sunday morning, read the latest updates, and by ten in the morning we were drunk and high and had made the decision not to leave the house for the rest of the day because of how scary the world seemed, so I hope you guys are handling it just as adult-like.**

 **A lot of you know that I live in New Zealand. We're pretty secluded, we're pretty safe when it comes to most things. We are so _incredibly lucky_. Compared to most countries right now, we still are safe and secluded and lucky.**

 **Three weeks ago, we had no cases (at least, no one was being tested and it was not a concern at that stage). Then we had eight, then twelve, then twenty, then twenty-eight and as I'm writing this I think we're at one hundred and two, which is quite a jump for just a week and a half since we first started hearing about them.**

 **There was an announcement yesterday that from midnight tomorrow, our country is going into lockdown, as there has now officially been evidence of community transmission with two of the cases. So...My husband and I are nervous but we're okay. I will be working from home, likely also working overtime, as my job is essential, and a lot of my co-workers are actually still expected to go into the office, but because of my health I'll be at home with my husband and my cats.**

 **My husband will not be working, which means like a lot of people in the world right now, we're worried about meeting our financial obligations, but I would take those concerns over watching him get sick. He's been exposed to a couple of people who are reckless and stupid and have come back from overseas and not self-isolated, and one of those people are now being tested, so we have to wait for those results. One of our nieces was tested the other night, and we should have the results back by tomorrow evening. We don't have any children, but we have lots of nieces and nephews, and we have a lot of friends with children who have health issues, and we lot of elderly relatives as well, and they're all of our focus right now.**

 **All around the world, we're seeing these incredible gestures of humanity that _prove that people are good_. There's just so much shit going on, so many politicians who are trying to act as though they know everything and haven't made a single misstep (I'm not even going to pretend I'm not insinuating the horrendous lump that sits in the Oval Office), so many companies that are looking at making money off peoples suffering, and _so much uncertainty_ and fear and we just have to remember that a majority of people _are good_.**

 **Now, even with my country going into lock down, I just wanted to say that even though I'm expected to work, I'm still going to try and get up some small oneshots along with some hopefully quicker chapters, because I feel all _I_ can do in this crisis is possibly provide you guys with a few minutes of entertainment.**

 **I just wanted to give you guys a bit of an update as to where I'm sitting in this whole...Fucking disaster. Please, feel free to message me, if you want to talk about where you guys are at, or if you guys have some ideas for some of the quick oneshots that you want to see, or if you just want to talk music or movies, I mean, we all have to be there for each other, right?**

 **I love you all so much and I hope, hope, hope you and yours are all safe in this weird time,**

 **Me xx**

 **Tumblr: SereneCalamity  
** **Twitter: CalamitySerene**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey, guys! I hope you're all safe! I hope you're all sane! I hope you're all blessed with brilliant house companions and high speed internet! I am trying to stay positive because the world is fucking scary, and on with the chapter!**

Clary hadn't talked much when she got back to the Garroway house, and she hadn't eaten much either, which she knew that she was going to regret in the morning but at the time, she just hadn't been hungry. Simon had been sitting around the table with the seven or eight pack members who were there, looking completely at home which wasn't surprising at all. He had looked up from where he was stuffing his face with some of Catarina's famous home made dumplings and given her a look, asking her if she needed him in that single glance and Clary was _so grateful_ for him. She'd just shaken her head, taking the plate out of the microwave that Jocelyn had put aside for her and picking at the dumplings and salad, knowing that the werewolves in the next room could hear her and were aware that she was right there, but were giving her the space that she needed.

As expected, when Clary woke up the next morning, she was _starving_ , and before she left the house for a job, she finished two apples and a banana. It was a good thing that everyone else was asleep _and_ the fact that she had never had to deal with a human side effect like a stitch in her life or else Jocelyn would be demanding that she wait at least half an hour after eating before she exercised. Her wolf wasn't protesting about hunger pains anymore, and she'd gotten a good nights sleep given she had gone to bed almost as soon as she had gotten home—right after she had eaten and had a quick shower—so it felt good to be running again.

This time, though, she made sure to head in the complete opposite direction from where her old home used to be, because two times in less than a week was quite enough, and this morning was a new day.

It was almost seven o'clock when her phone rang, and when she pulled it out and saw _Raph'_ s name on the screen, a confused frown creased her forehead. Her wolf paced inside of her, torn between this strange sense of loyalty to her mate and the comfort and friendship that Raphael had been providing her for the past few years. Clary shook her head, swiping her finger across the screen at the last minute before the call cut off, and lifted her phone to her ear.

"Hey, Raph," she said, and she made a face to herself, because she could _hear_ the slight strain in her voice, which meant that Raphael would _definitely_ be able to hear it.

"Hey, _cariño_ ," Raphael replied easily, and Clary couldn't help the way her frown deepened, which made her wolf scratch and paw at her ribs uncomfortably. Raphael and her were good—they were _great_ , even, they always had been—other than Simon, Raphael would be the person that she considered her best friend and had been a complete anchor for her, even though they had always known that the romantic side of their relationship was never going to last forever. Her wolf had occasionally pulled away from Raphael, especially after they had sex and definitely when his fingers had brushed near the nape of her neck, but other than that, her wolf had found comfort in him. "So...Can you tell me what's going on yet?" Clary couldn't help but smile ruefully at the blunt question, grateful at how Raphael didn't dance around the subject, but then the smile dropped with what her response was going to be.

"I came back with my mate," she replied softly, and there was silence on the other end of the phone. Clary wrinkled her nose, and she looked down at her feet, where her shoes were pressing into the damp, overgrown grass of the path that she had chosen to take. She was probably only about ten minutes away from the Garroway house now, so she started walking slowly in that direction.

"I figured it had something to do with him," is what Raphael eventually said.

"Yeah," Clary said quietly, not sure what else to reply. Raphael _knew_ about Jace, but it wasn't something they had ever discussed at length. Jace had never been someone that she had discussed with _anyone_ at length, except maybe with her therapist.

"Well..." Clary knew Raphael well enough to know that he was picking his words carefully, which was unusual for him, and she appreciated the effort. "Are you okay? Are you happy? We...Never really spoke much about him, but—I mean, there had to be a reason that you left, so..." he trailed off again and Clary felt her heart squeeze, because she knew that this was hard for Raphael. Even though they had always known what they had wouldn't last for a long time, what they shared was always temporary, she knew that she meant a lot to Raphael—and he meant a lot to her as well, just...She had always been a bit more reserved. He was careful about the people that he let get close to him, he had to be, given how many people he had watched grow old and die, including all of his family and the friends that he had grown up with before he had been turned into a vampire, but he had let down his walls with Clary, she had seen that. "I just want to know that you're safe and happy," Raphael finally said and Clary smiled sadly, glad that he couldn't see her face.

"I'm safe," Clary told him honestly. "And I think I'm happy—I'm not _unhappy_. I'm still...Figuring everything out. Taking it a day at a time. Adjusting and stuff." There was silence again before there was the sound of Raphael drawing in a deep breath, which was clearly only to break the silence since Raphael had no reason to breathe.

"So that's why you left to go back home? To reconnect with your mate?" Raphael asked, and Clary could hear the tug in his voice.

"I mean, that's not—not _entirely_ it," Clary said, and she felt a bit better now, because the conversation was about to shift. "You know how things haven't been great for me lately? I just—something has been off and I haven't been able to figure out what it is."

"I know that Simon has been helping you a lot," Raphael told her. "You've smelt even more like his magic than usual."

"Yeah," Clary nodded, running a hand through her hair. "I mean, things have always been... _Harder_ than normal—" she wasn't going to get back into Jace with Raphael if she could help it, so she moved on quickly. "But I've just felt really uneasy lately, and just—I don't know. It's hard to concentrate sometimes and get a solid sleep and sometimes it feels as though my wolf is she just going to rip right out of my skin." Clary rolled her shoulders as she recalled how she had been feeling for so long, tipping back her head and scrunching up her nose. "I don't know what's going on with my wolf or with me, but I feel better here, and just feel as though I've been fighting everything for so long that I don't want to come back and _feel_ like that again any time soon."

It was the first time she was saying that out loud, even though the thought had been hovering at the back of her mind for a few days now. It made her suck her lower lip into her mouth and bite down hard on the soft flesh, making her wince at the sharp taste of metallic blood that flooded her blood.

"I understand, Clary," Raphael's voice was soft, and it made her relax slightly...Although not as much as a simple brush of Jace's hand to the back of her neck, she couldn't help but note with a surprising blink. "You don't need to explain yourself." Clary rubbed a hand over her face and nodded to herself. "Look, uh—did you maybe want me and Heidi to have a look around your place? Just to make sure everything's okay? I know Simon would have checked it out pretty thoroughly as well, but it couldn't help to have another set of eyes run over it?" It wasn't a bad idea. A werewolf and a warlock hadn't found something, a vampire might be able to find something that they couldn't.

"Actually, yeah," Clary replied. "Yeah, that would be really good. You've got a key to my place, if you could check it out? Simon has wards up around my place, and he would always strengthen them, and there was never any damage or anything to show that someone had tampered with them. And I had never been able to smell anyone there, or anything unusual."

"We'll go around this evening and see what we can find...Maybe talk to a few of your neighbours. Mrs Davis loves me," he tacked on and Clary could just imagine his smirk.

"Yeah, yeah, if you end up going there, she'll probably never let you leave," Clary grinned.

"I don't know about that," Raphael snorted. "I'll have Heidi with me, and I don't think anyone would keep her anywhere if they didn't have to." Clary made a face at the mention of the blonde but she didn't _say_ anything, because she _tried_ to be nice when it came to Heidi, because she felt sorry for the girl.

"Thank you, Raph," she said instead and Raphael made a humming noise on the other end of the phone.

"Of course, _dulzura_ ," he replied gently, and Clary bit her lip as she looked down at her feet, knowing that she was never going to be in a position with Raphael again where he said that word to her softly in person the way that he had before. She didn't feel _regretful_ , but she did feel _bad_. "If it's not too late when we get back, I'll give you a call tonight, otherwise I'll call around the same time tomorrow." Clary was known for waking up early, even in the weekends or when she didn't have to, and it was the best time for Raphael to be able to call her, since he was meant to be sleeping through the day.

"Okay—and tell Heidi thank you as well," Clary added and there was a light snort.

"Yeah, I will," he said. "I'll talk to you soon. Take care of yourself." Clary echoed the sentiment back to him before they ended the call and she took in a deep breath. She didn't think the odds of Raphael and Heidi finding anything were high, but there was no harm in them looking. Raphael was older than Simon, so maybe there would be something that he could sense that even Simon couldn't.

Heidi was still young for a vampire _and_ for a human—younger than Clary. She had been turned when she was just nineteen, and she had only been turned for about a year before Clary had met her, so she was still a fledgling, really, even now, a few years later. She was high strung, even for a vampire, very arrogant and needy and a bit whiny, but Clary still felt sorry for her. Her and Heidi had never really got on well, probably because Heidi had such a strong tie to Raphael, her sire, the bond even stronger since she was still such a strong vampire, and in the year before Raphael had met Clary and his attention had shifted a little. Clary was pretty sure it was just some petty jealousy, and that was Heidi acted like a bit of a brat when it came to Clary. The werewolf didn't really trust her, but then she hadn't trusted Raphael or Simon for a long time either, but Raphael kept her in line, and even though she was a vampire, Clary generally viewed her as harmless, sort of like a petulant teenager.

Clary continued running until she decided to go back to the pack house, breathing coming out just a little bit harder as she jogged up the steps and stopped at the swinging chair to drop a kiss to Catarina's cheek before she headed inside. Luke was washing dishes and he called out a hello as she walked through, and so she detoured through the kitchen to give him a quick kiss as well before heading up the stairs and straight to the bathroom after getting a towel out of the cupboard.

Her mind...Surprisingly calm as she took her time using the same type of shampoo and conditioner that her mum had been buying for _years_ now, flowery and organic and comforting, massaging it into her scalp and then foaming up with the lavender body wash and rubbing it all over before shaving with one of the travel razors that she had grabbed from under the sink. She hated using cheap razors, but it wasn't like she had much of a choice when most of her toiletries were back in her apartment in New York—she hadn't thought to grab her razor when she'd been getting her toothbrush and toothpaste and deodorant.

She was going to need to buy herself a proper razor if she stayed here much longer.

She was going to need to buy herself a lot of things...Or bring them here.

She was going to need to sort something out—and pretty soon too.

And just like that, the calm that had settled over her mind disappeared. Clary let out a huff and rolled her eyes as she tipped back her head to let the suds out of her hair, washing herself off. It wasn't that she felt overwhelmed, things had settled a bit in her mind and her wolf had accepted a lot, and it was at times like these that she had no idea how humans dealt without being able to draw on the inner strength of their wolves.

"Fuck!" Clary squeaked out as she walked into her room, a towel wrapped loosely around her middle and Simon laying back over her bed.

"I was not even _trying_ to be quiet," Simon hummed out, looking amused as she shut the door behind her, dropping the towel as she walked over to the dressed and started rummaging through, not caring about Simon seeing her bare form.

"Yeah, well, I've got a lot on my mind," Clary replied, and Simon's scent was so familiar, just like most of the pack, and since he had been here for a few days now, her room stunk of him. "We should go out tonight or something. Go into the city. Dinner and a bar or something, I feel like we need to—get out of here for an evening." Simon's eyebrows quirked upward at that and a bright grin spread across his face.

"You know I'm _always_ down for that," he said with a grin. The beauties of getting drunk in a human bar was that Clary felt the affects for a little bit and could have fun, but then sobered up enough that she could make her way home safely. Good thing about going out with Simon as well was that as long as they were close to their home or wherever they were staying in, he could snap his fingers, and they were home. " _Yes_ , tonight, _let's do it_." Clary grinned as she pulled on a pair of black briefs and a black bra and then started looking for a tank top. "But first, let's discuss...You. Jace. Whatever. Where's your head, yeah?" Clary wrinkled her nose as she looked back at him.

"I don't know," Clary sighed and Simon arched an eyebrow before she turned back to grab out some jeans to go with her top and start pulling them on. Simon settled back on her bed, looking up at the ceiling with his eyes lazily half closed, arms folded loosely behind his head. Clary climbed onto the bed and settled next to him, resting her head on one of his arms. "Okay, so..." she heaved out a heavy sigh.

"So?" Simon prompted after a moment of silence.

"I think I'm going to be here for a while...Right?" Clary mumbled.

"Right," Simon agreed without a moment of hesitation.

"How long do you think?" Clary asked, her voice soft.

"You mean you haven't realized that your place is here yet?" Simon asked. "I don't think you're going anywhere, anytime soon, Clary," he turned his head to look at her, big eyes blinking from behind his ridiculous glasses. Clary stared at him and her nose twitched before she felt tears well up in her eyes, twisting her body around so that she was turned into him completely, and Simon wrapped an arm around her tightly in a hug.

"But...What about you?" Clary's voice was muffled against his shirt, and it was a stupid question, because Simon was a warlock, he'd never had ties to a pack, or a coven, or a mate before, he'd always been a free spirit. When he and Clary became friends, no matter how close they got, Clary had always assumed her time with Simon was limited.

"Wherever you go, I go, Clary, surely you know that," Simon let out a laugh, as though it was the stupidest question to ask.

" _What_?!" Clary jerked away from Simon and he just grinned back at her, puppy-dog like.

"You're my best friend, Clary," Simon told her. "In terms you use, you're my pack. Where you go, I go. Okay?" Clary blinked at him, and then the tears starting flowing over and Simon let out a wet sounding laugh before he was hugging her tighter against his side.

 **I have a few TV recommendations few guys, since we've been inside doing almost nothing else for the past few weeks. _Breeders_ is really funny in a total black comedy kind of way, although there's definitely a few things that hit a little close to home. And then there's _Car Masters: Rust to Riches_ which is this car show where they take cars and do them up into something crazy. Me just writing that sounds bland as shit, and I never watch this shows! Haha. We never watch car shows or anything, but this one is just different, the whole group is just really entertaining. There's two seasons, so yeah, just check it out to see if it's your thing!**

 **My top ten songs that I would recommend this time around are;**

 **1) _Smiling When I Die_ \- Sasha Sloan. 2) _Forever_ \- Fletcher. 3) _On_ \- BTS. 4) _Kissing Other People_ \- Lennon Stella. 5) _Pretend You're Missing Me_ \- Betty Who. 6) _Not In The Same Way_ \- 5 Seconds of Summer. 7) _Paper Hearts_ \- Tori Kelly. 8) _Cruel Intentions_ \- Delacey and G-Eazy. 9) _Ophelia_ \- The Lumineers. 10) _Highway To Heaven_ \- NCT 127.**

 **I hope you guys enjoyed the update! And the recommendations! I hope they provided a little bit of distraction in these...Weird times we're living in. Leave a comment, let me know what you thought of the update and please recommend songs and movies and TV series and whatever! I've heard from a few people that they've looked at other peoples recommendations and really enjoyed them, so it's not just me you're being a hero for right now! Haha.**

 **Much love from me to you x**

 **Tumblr: SereneCalamity**  
 **Twitter: CalamitySerene**


	14. Chapter 14

A night out in the city turned out to be exactly what both Clary and Simon needed, checking in to a hotel room that Simon easily cleaned out with his magic so that it didn't smell like a hundred other people and cheap cleaning products that would just grind at Clary's wolf. They got drunk and Simon let his magic play with their drinks a bit so that they got _drunker_ , and they ate good food, and they went to bars that Clary had only been able to get in with a fake ID before she had moved to the city, and they found a dumpling house that was still open at three in the morning and selling good dumplings, that made Simon experience something _religious_ as he moaned and nearly fell to his knees on the sticky tiled floors.

"I can't believe how long it's been since we've had a night out like that," Clary laughed as she indicated to pull her mothers car into the driveway, the two on their way back to Luke's pack house after their night out. It was almost midday, since they had gone out to breakfast after sleeping in, and taken their time looking around a couple of shops as well, since apparently it had been _years_ since Simon had been in the Los Angeles area.

"Well, you're usually not up for it," Simon pointed out. "But it's not like you need my magic to make you feel better anymore. Jace is _all the healing drug you need_ ," he sung it out playfully and Clary just rolled her eyes at him. They were about halfway up the long driveway, and Simon was singing along to Khalid on the radio—horribly off key even though he actually had a decent singing voice when he actually tried—when a different scent reached Clary's nose, and her shoulders tensed a little. Simon reached over to turn the radio down the moment he noticed the shift in her demeanor, but he didn't say anything as they drove up the rest of the way to the house, Clary parking the car next to the unfamiliar silver Corvette and getting out.

"It smells like Jace's pack," Clary noted as she paused by the car. "Actually, I think I've seen her with Jace before." Simon followed after her, just half a step behind as they walked up the wooden steps and into the house, Clary leading them toward where she could hear talking coming from. On the back porch of the house, Jocelyn and Catarina were talking to Isabelle, who Clary recognized from when she had seen Jace at the markets, all three women looking up as Clary and Simon approached them. "Hi," Clary's voice came out carefully as she glanced between them, clearly trying not to tense up. Isabelle's eyes flickered quickly between Jocelyn and Clary before she stepped forward with a small but warm smile on her face.

"Hey, Clary. Um, we didn't meet properly last time," Isabelle said, and there was a way that she was ducking her head slightly that showed that she wasn't trying to be any type of threat that made Clary's wolf calm down inside her ribs. "I'm Isabelle—Izzy."

"Hi," Clary repeated again, and then took in a deep breath, inhaling Isabelle's scent and once again being able to settle her wolf with the fact that Isabelle wasn't trying to confront her or intimidate her in any kind of way. "I'm Clary," she said, a little unnecessarily, but reached out her hand toward Isabelle. Isabelle smiled widely at her, obviously happy that Clary wasn't shutting down her greeting, and she took her hand, gripping firmly but not squeezing her fingers too tight.

"And I'm Simon," Simon piped up from behind Clary, jostling her shoulder a little as she reached past her to thrust his hand forward. "Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you as well," Isabelle grinned as she took Simon's hand and shook it as well, her eyes twinkling, and Clary felt herself relax more. The other werewolf seemed genuine, a lot softer than her older brother, that was for sure, maybe a lot more like her younger brother, who Clary had really enjoyed meeting. "Um, Clary? I was hoping that maybe we could go for a run together?" Clary felt her shoulders tense again, and her eyes slid over to her mother and Catarina, both who were giving her encouraging, warm looks, clearly wanting to her to take up Isabelle's offer.

"I'll—I'm just going to get changed first," she said, and it wasn't just to buy herself some time, she didn't _really_ want to run in the skin tight jeans she was wearing right now. But a breather and a moment away from this situation to get herself ready for whatever was coming next would be good as well.

"Great! I'll wait for you out front?" Isabelle suggested and Clary realized that Isabelle was already wearing leggings and loose singlet.

"Sounds good," Clary replied before she turned and headed back into the house. She purposefully didn't try to listen in on any of the conversation downstairs, and once she got up to her childhood bedroom, she took her time changing, wondering what was going to happen. Things with Isabelle seemed less intense than both Alec and Maia, a lot more like Max, who were the only ones that she could compare the dark haired girl with in Jace's pack since they were all that she had really met. She changed into a pair of shorts and sports bra with a loose shirt and tied on a pair of sneakers before heading back down. Simon was just walking into the kitchen, reaching up to get himself a glass and he paused to look back at her with a knowing look.

"Be nice," he said airily.

"I'm always nice," Clary grumbled, and then couldn't help but lean in to give him a quick hug and breathe in his comforting scent, and she felt his magic play over her skin in a soothing way before she pulled back. He tugged at her ponytail before she was walking out the front door to where Isabelle was waiting. The dark haired girl was quickly threading her hair into a braid and she flashed a smile as Clary joined her.

"Ready?" She asked.

"Ready," Clary nodded, her wolf feeling a bit skittish behind her ribs as she slowly walked down the last few steps onto the ground and flexed her toes in the sneakers that she was wearing. There seemed to some kind of understanding between the wolves, and Isabelle tilted her head to the side, a sign of respect by allowing Clary to start the run. Clary nodded at her again before she started running, picking out one of the tracks that she had been running on in the mornings, one that had been clearly run a lot by the wolves of Luke's pack given how much it smelt like all of them. Isabelle was clearly fast and had good stamina, Clary could pick that up within a few seconds of running with her, and her wolf was nervous, not too sure what exactly it was that the dark haired girl wanted, but she pushed herself to keep running, always half a step in front of Isabelle as they followed the overgrown track further into the forest that surrounded the house.

There was a faint sheen of sweat on both women's foreheads when they slowed down as they got to a creek, taking time to kneel down and splash water on their faces and drink from their hands, their wolves happy with for the reprieve, and then they were running again, no words exchanged. Isabelle didn't know these forests as well as Clary did, although it wasn't as though Clary knew them the best either, things were a bit different from when she had grown up here, although the underlying smell was the same and she knew she would be able to find her way if she needed to. While Isabelle was unfamiliar with the land, she was agile and a quick learner, and she forced Clary to always be paying attention to where she was going so that she could keep her lead. Isabelle wasn't necessarily _competing_ for the lead, but she was definitely making Clary work to keep it.

It was a while before they stopped running, and it was Isabelle who stopped them when they did, the taller werewolf slowing to a jog and then finally stopping and waiting for Clary to circle back to her slowly. Isabelle was panting slightly, but her breathing returned to normal quickly and Clary eyed her warily.

"So," she prompted, taking the lead since she knew Isabelle wanted _something_. She hadn't just come here to run, and Clary knew that.

"So..." Isabelle bit down on the corner of her bottom lip and then shrugged. "You know that Jace is my cousin as well as my Alpha, right?" Clary nodded as Isabelle sat down on a large fallen log. The wood was sturdy, Clary could see that just by glancing it over, and it would hold both of their weight, but she waited, keeping distance between them and scenting the air out of habit. Isabelle didn't present a threat, but she was definitely guarded, although that was understandable. "Then...I mean, you would know that _I_ know, especially about all the pain that he's been through over the years...Since he met you." Isabelle pursed her lips together as she met Clary's eyes, obviously leaving the ball in her court since the comment she had just made could definitely be seen as...Passive aggressive.

"Is this the shovel talk?" Clary asked bluntly, and her wolf was starting to paw at the pit of her stomach, feeling the hackles rise down the back of her neck. Isabelle met her gaze and the two werewolves stared at each other for a long, tense moment, Clary's vision beginning to flicker between normal and a slight golden sheen, when Isabelle swallowed hard and looked away. There was something small, in the way she ducked her head and bared the side of her throat subtly, that made Clary wonder if it was out of respect, or if it was instinct, but either way, she was satisfied.

"No, not quite," Isabelle shrugged a shoulder, bit down on her bottom lip and then pointedly patted the log next to her. Clary hesitated for a moment but then moved over to sit down on the fallen tree, not as close to Isabelle as the other werewolf seemed to want, but not far. "You've caused him a lot of pain, but I know that you've been through a lot as well. At the end of the day...I just want to meet you," the smile that Isabelle gave Clary was genuine, and there was something pure in her scent that made Clary settle surprisingly easily. "I mean, I saw you at the beach, the other day, but I didn't really get to meet you, and I've heard a lot about you—from your mum and Luke, and from Jace," she added Jace's name easily, not like an insult or something that Clary should feel guilty about, and Clary couldn't help the way the corners of her lips began to turn upward. "And you're going to be part of our pack, so I just wanted to meet you." Her and her younger brother were quite similar. And she smelt like fresh apples, which was refreshing and sweet.

"Yeah, eventually," Clary nodded slowly and Isabelle nodded in response, no hesitation or question.

"Maybe I could tell you a little bit about our pack?" Isabelle offered and Clary blinked, her wolf heavy with the weight of the offer. So far, she had only briefly met Alec, Maia and Max, and now Isabelle, and Jace's pack—well, Isabelle was right, it was going to be her pack one day. And while Clary said eventually _now,_ she didn't actually know how long she meant. Especially with the way her wolf was warming so quickly to Isabelle.

"Yeah," Clary said, and she let herself get a little bit closer on the damp log. "Yeah, I'd like that." Isabelle's smile got wider and the dark haired girl nodded.

Clary expected Isabelle to start with Jace, but maybe she decided that she didn't need to because Clary already knew him, so she started with Alec, and she kept her profiles surprisingly brief and factual, but the expression on her face gave away all her fond feelings for those in her pack.

Alec was twenty-six, a year older than Jace, three years older than Isabelle—which made Isabelle Clary's age—and Isabelle said that even though he acted like the world most emotional teenager, apparently this was actually _happy_ Alec, because he'd met his mate over a year ago. Alec was second to Jace, along with Maia, and Clary felt Isabelle side eye her when she mentioned that, but Clary didn't say anything. Magnus Bane was Alec's mate and he was a warlock, he and Catarina actually knew each other and had for several centuries, although he was younger than Catarina but still _incredibly_ powerful. Isabelle's face was full of smiles when talking about Magnus, and she assured Clary that she would love him as long as she appreciated glitter. Clary mentioned that she had nothing against glitter, and Isabelle laughed.

Then there was Maia, who was twenty-four, the other second in the pack, and Isabelle said that she could be a little intense sometimes, but she always meant well. She had a quick temper, but she got over it even quicker, which was a typical trait among werewolves, and she wasn't to be messed with when the claws were out, which made sense, given her position in the pack. Jordan Kyle was her mate, one of the only two humans in their pack, and he lived with them at the big house as well. They'd known each other since high school, and it sounded as though Maia had had a rough time growing up—Isabelle didn't go into details, which Clary respected and didn't ask about it—and Jordan had been with her through it all, had found out she was a werewolf then and stood by her when she had found Jace and wanted to become part of his pack.

Will was Jace's uncle, ten years older than him and full of unhelpful comments and sarcastic remarks, although there was clear fondness in Isabelle's tone. Apparently he wasn't very _present_ around the house or in pack meetings, but every now and then he would really come through for them. Then there was Max, who Clary had met already, who technically didn't live at the big, pack house with Jace and some of the others, he lived with Robert and Maryse, their parents. Robert and Maryse were part of the pack as well, they lived about a fifteen minute drive away, both of them with law degrees that they often used to help supernatural beings, although they operated under the guise of a normal, husband-and-wife law firm.

Imogen Herondale was the eldest member of the pack, other than Magnus, well over a hundred and Jace's paternal grandmother. Isabelle sounded a little in awe, a little scared when talking about her, and Clary couldn't help but feel a squeeze of nervousness at the idea of meeting the woman. Isabelle seemed to note this and she bumped Clary's shoulder with her own. Her health was dwindling and her eye sight was going, old age catching up to the werewolf, and about a year ago, Jace had looked for someone to help her around home, which brought them to someone who apparently wasn't a _member_ of the pack, but was around a lot. Kaelie Whitewillow was a werecoyote, and she was Imogen's part-time carer, and she spent a lot of time with the pack but Jace hadn't asked her to be a part of it officially and she also hadn't asked, which made sense, since coyotes were generally more solitary, but there was something about Kaelie that Isabelle _wasn't_ saying, because Clary heard the uptick of nerves in her heartbeat, but she didn't comment on it.

The last ones in the pack were Helen Penhallow-Blackthorn, her human wife and mate, Aline Penhallow, and their daughter, Alessa Penhallow, who was their youngest pack member. Even though Aline was human, her mother hadn't been, and she had grown up close with the Lightwoods and also Jace, and she had always been aware of werewolves and the supernatural elements in the world. She'd met Helen a couple of years ago, and they'd married within eighteen months. Their daughter Alessa had been born last year, she was almost nine months old now, and her eyes had recently started flashing gold, a sign that she was presenting as a werewolf. Clary couldn't help the way her heart felt as though it was melting just the tiniest bit at the prospect of a baby in the pack.

Their pack.

 _Her_ pack?

"We all get together for dinner at least once a week," Isabelle continued. "We're getting together tonight, up at the house—you know, just carry on up the driveway past the barn house that Jace is working on—and I think it would be really great if you came."

"Um," Clary blinked at Isabelle and for the first time in a while, since she had settled next to Isabelle on the fallen tree, she felt a bit uncomfortable again.

"You can bring your friend," Isabelle quickly offered. "The warlock? From back at the house?" She jerked her head over her shoulder, indicating back toward the Greymark house.

"Yeah, Simon," Clary nodded, feeling a bit shaky at the prospect of facing the entire pack all at once, even though she knew that she was going to need to. "Yeah," she nodded firmly, forcing herself not to chew down on her bottom lip, looking ahead and hoping that her scent hadn't soured too much with nerves. " _Yes_ ," she reiterated. "We'll come."

"Cool," Isabelle smiled widely at her, and her fingers twitched at her side, as though she wanted to reach out and touch Clary, but she didn't. They just sat there for a bit longer, until the tension left the atmosphere again, and then they ran back to the house, more alongside each other this time than apart.

 **Hey, guys. Hope you enjoyed the update. Be kind and well.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Okay. This isn't edited yet. I honestly don't have the energy. I will do it later. I love you all, please, please, please keep yourself safe and keep the ones you love close x**

"You made cake?" Max's overexcited voice was heard through the entire house as he bounded inside, his nose twitching as he ran into the kitchen and threw an arm around his sisters shoulders. He had caught up in height to her last year, and was now steadily still getting taller, resting his head against hers and reaching forward to try and dip a finger into the cream cheese frosting that was in the big green bowl Isabelle was currently whipping up.

"Hey!" Isabelle snapped out, hand moving at lightning speed to slap his fingers away and Max pouted, pulling back from Isabelle and then looking up with rounded eyes as Jace came into the kitchen. He smiled at his Alpha and Jace smiled back at him, just a small one, but a fond one just meant for his pack, and he lifted a hand to brush it through Max's hair and then rest it at the back of Max's neck, giving it a squeeze. Max leaned against him and Jace kept his hand there, soothing and comforting, and Jace narrowed his eyes.

"Izzy?" Jace asked.

"Hm?" Isabelle hummed out.

"Why are you making cake?" Jace raised an eyebrow and Isabelle shrugged a shoulder as she moved over to the two layers of cake that were on cooling racks, smelling incredible. Isabelle was a terrible cook, but an incredible baker, but she generally hated being trapped in the kitchen. "Izzy?" Jace asked again and Isabelle finally turned around, the spatula in her hand and a smile on her face, although there was something a little nervous in the corners of her eyes.

"I invited Clary and her friend Simon to come to dinner tonight," Isabelle said, her voice even and confident, and Max let out a cheer but Jace stilled, other than his hand falling to his side as Max darted out of the kitchen, probably to share the news.

"You...Invited Clary and Simon over?" Jace spoke slowly, as though he hadn't quite heard her, even though from his reaction, Isabelle was very aware that he had.

"Yup," Isabelle replied as she went back to slathering frosting on top of the first layer of carrot cake.

"Without asking me?" Jace continued, and he hadn't moved from where he had been standing next to Max a few moments ago when the younger boy had still been there.

"I didn't realize that we had to ask for your _permission_ to invite pack over on pack dinner night," Isabelle sung out, glancing over her shoulder, and there was a smirk on her lips, and if she was anyone else in the pack—even if she was Alec—she would be getting a glare, or at least a flash of his red, Alpha eyes, but instead he just kept one eyebrow arched and his lips pressed together. Isabelle grinned back at him, turning back to her cakes. Finally, Jace came over, bumping her shoulder briefly.

"She's not pack yet," he told her quietly. "I don't want you getting your hopes up."

"Like you? And Max?" Isabelle retorted, although there was no bite in her words. Jace froze again, but it was only for a split second and then he sighed and moved away. Isabelle paused what she was doing to watch him go, and she smiled as she heard him join Max and Helen in the lounge with Alessa. A lot of the pack was already there, and so they were all going to find out soon enough that Clar was coming with Max bouncing around. The only ones who weren't here yet were Isabelle's parents, Aline, Jordan, Imogen and Kaelie, since Kaelie always came with Imogen. Part of her hoped that Clary would arrive before them, so that she had some time to settle before _everyone_ was at the house, but either way, Clary and Simon seemed as though they had a strong enough bond that he could settle her down. She was just finishing spreading on the icing of the carrot cake when the familiar scent of Will appeared behind her, and she narrowed her eyes as she prepared for _him_ to try and get in a swipe at the cake, like her brother had.

Luckily, that didn't seem to be his focus.

"I hear you invited Miss Clarissa over for dinner," he noted airily behind them and Isabelle glanced over her shoulder.

"You got a problem with that?" She asked with an arched eyebrow.

"None at all," Will grinned as he opened the fridge, taking out one of the specially made bottles of the beer that had a wolfsbane percentage running through it as well. "It'll make for an interesting evening." He tipped the neck of the bottle in Isabelle's direction before he was sauntering out, and Isabelle just rolled her eyes as she started on the dishes. She heard the tell-tale clicking of Jordan's rusty old truck getting closer down the driveway, and there was sounds of another car not too far behind, and she kept her eyes trained out the kitchen window to see if it was possibly Clary and her warlock friend.

It was.

Jordan was in his truck in front, with Aline in the passenger seat next to him, and they both had obviously noticed Clary and Simon in the car behind them, because their eyes instantly flicked toward the window of the kitchen that looked out over the lawn where the cars parked, meeting Isabelle's gaze questioningly. She flashed them a smile, telling them it was okay with a simple look, and they both seemed to relax at that, turning off the truck and getting out, circling around to the back to get the groceries out.

"Max!" Isabelle called out. "Go help with groceries!" There was a small yip in response, from somewhere in the lounge behind her, and she heard feet running across the floor a few moments later before she saw Max heading outside, meeting Jordan with overflowing paper bags in his arms just as Clary was parking her car up alongside the truck and getting out. Max seemed to completely forget about his original reason for heading outside when he spotted them, bounding over, but Isabelle didn't call out to remind him, hoping that he would relax Clary a bit, because Isabelle could _feel_ her nerves, all the way from up here. Jace and Will came back into the kitchen, and Isabelle leaned back into Jace as he came over to look out the window, and he rested his hand on her shoulder. She could feel him centering himself, and then Will snorted.

"Please tell me you prepared her for Imogen," he muttered as he sipped from his beer and Isabelle instantly felt Jace tense up again behind her. " _And_ Kaelie."

"She'll be fine," Isabelle replied, throwing a glare over at him and Will just grinned back. She pulled the fingers and he made a wounded face before leaving again and she rolled her eyes. "Ignore him," she murmured to Jace.

"That's generally what I try to do," Jace replied and Isabelle grinned. Jordan, Aline and Max had gathered all of the groceries from the back of his truck, and it looked like Simon was carrying one of the bags as well, talking to Jordan as the five all walked inside, while Clary was carrying a chiller bag. She was walking slower behind the others, although Max was right at her side, chattering away, and Isabelle smiled as she looked out at her brother, and her wolf made a happy purring noise of the _whole_ pack being together tonight.

It wasn't going to be easy, that would be naive to think, but she hoped it would be a good start.

* * *

It didn't take long, by five thirty, everyone was at the house and it was loud and boisterous and Clary felt overwhelmed and grounded at the same time, her wolf feeling at home among the werewolves that she clearly knew were her pack, but her human side was pulling back, not letting her wolf run free with the others, be open and affectionate like it wanted her to be. Jace had smiled at her when she arrived, and come over to give her a quick hug, but then Maryse and Robert had arrived—the Lightwood parents—and they had obviously been just as surprised by her presence there as _Jace_ had been, because she had been able to _smell_ the hesitance and nervousness on him and she was guessing that Isabelle hadn't really given him a heads up before she had shown up.

Everyone seemed to at least be accepting of the fact that Clary was there, although there was definitely a divide between the camp that seemed to like her and those that were _a lot_ more hesitant. But then there was Imogen, who Isabelle had been right about, was _terrifying_ , and there was Kaelie.

Clary wasn't stupid.

It only took her two minutes to put everything together from the time that Kaelie had arrived to put together that there was definitely something between her and Jace. She wasn't sure if it was current or if it had recently stopped, but she knew that it wasn't _history_ , at least not for Kaelie, and probably not for Jace as well, because their hug was tight and slightly lingering, and the way that Kaelie was angling her neck to _never_ look in Clary's direction was very telling. But that wasn't something that she was going anywhere near tonight, that wasn't what tonight was about, and there was _a lot_ else to focus on.

"Yeah, so there's a lot of event managements, mainly for weddings or engagements parties, but sometimes work conferences and stuff," Clary explained, keeping things brief since it was clear that Imogen was only asking out of politeness, her stiff expression and complete lack of smile a dead giveaway.

"And is that based just in New York? Or do they also have a branch here?" Imogen asked, and _that_ was clearly where the conversation had been heading and Clary's smile stiffened slightly.

"They are based in New York," Clary replied, and she kept her voice light but the older werewolf would definitely be able to smell her annoyance, but before she had to think about what else to say, Simon was at her side, his scent soothing and calming and slipping an arm through hers.

"Sorry, just need to steal Clary," Simon smiled brightly while tugging at Clary's arm, and then they were moving away without another word, out of the lounge where Clary had managed to get herself cornered when she was coming back from the bathroom Isabelle had pointed her toward. They didn't say anything as they walked away, given they were in a house with people who could hear every word they said, but he squeezed her arm in a comforting way as he lead her over to where Jordan was standing in the kitchen with Isabelle, a beer in his hand and a spatula in the other.

"Usually we do barbeques when the weather is good," Jordan said as he glanced over at them, an easy smile on his face, just like there had been when they had first arrived and Clary felt herself relax in the change in atmosphere instantly. "But _someone_ hasn't gone out and got us a new gas bottle yet," he didn't say it too loudly, but out on the deck where Jace and Alec were standing, Jace glanced back inside with a fond roll of his eyes and Jordan smiled back easily before taking a sip of his beer. The kinship between them was clear, even though Jordan was human, and Clary's wolf warmed at the way Jace clearly still viewed him as pack, just like Isabelle had said. Isabelle was humming along to the radio that was playing and she held out a glass of wine to Clary and pointed to where there were peeled garlic coves and a sharp knife.

"You wanna mince that while I watch? I'm only allowed to bake in this kitchen, everything else is viewing only," Isabelle grinned as she pulled herself up onto the counter and sipped at her own wine, which Clary quickly realized was infused with a touch of wolfsbane. She drank her wine a bit quicker, hoping the wolfsbane would help to calm her down a bit before she got to mincing the garlic, and then helping Jordan with the salad. Most of dinner had already been cooked and just needed to be heated up, and from the sounds of it, they usually took turns in the kitchen or else things got a little bit to crowded and chaotic which had resulted in more than one food fight. Clary and Isabelle were onto their second glasses of wine and Simon and Jordan were standing surprisingly close as they laughed over something related to the lasagna that Clary wasn't going to over-analyze in the moment when Jace came into the kitchen with Max in tow.

"It smells so good in here!" Max announced, and his nose was twitching and his fingers clenching at his side, clearing wanting to overtake Jace and follow his nose to the ribs that were piled up underneath a napkin but respectfully holding back. Jace moved to the side as they reached the kitchen and Max practically bounded past him, fingers stretching out for the lasagna that Jordan had just taken out of the oven, before Simon's magic was reaching out and lightly stinging. "Ow!" Max pouted as he looked over at Simon, who just gave him an easy smile, wiggling his eyebrows. For a moment, there was silence, and then Jordan laughed and Max giggled as he leaned against Isabelle's side and Clary smiled as she sipped from her wine again.

Jace's scent lightened as well, even if his expression didn't change, and that made Clary's nose twitch and her wolf feel anxious, eyes lowering, not wanting to give anything more away than her scent already was.

She didn't doubt that tonight would be the first night since she had been in California that she was going to need Simon's magic to help her sleep. Because she felt good and she felt settled for two minutes, when she was with Isabelle, and Simon, and Jordan, and even with Max, but then someone else came in, or _Jace_ came over, and she felt a wave of nervousness come over her. Jace sensed that— _everyone_ sensed that in the house, that was the downside to being around werewolves and their keen sense of smell, or other magic beings, but it was something that Clary just accepted, given that had always been the case.

"Did you want a refill?" Jace asked, his voice quiet and light from beside Clary as Isabelle took out two of the big salad bowls from the fridge and started carrying them outside, already yelling for everyone that dinner was ready as Max, Jordan and Simon starting picking up the other plates and bowls.

"Yeah, thanks," Clary flashed him a small smile, holding out her wine glass. Jace took it from her, their fingers brushing briefly and Clary folding her arms over her chest as she waited for him to fill her wine glass again. She may have flexed her fingers a little and then clenched that hand into a fist as she felt the phantom touch of Jace's fingers over the back of hers. When he handed it back, they didn't touch, but Jace didn't move away, only a foot or so between them.

"Sorry about...All this. And Isabelle kind of forcing all of this on you..." Jace's voice was still quiet, low, intimate. "They can be a lot."

"Most families are, but they mean well," Clary replied with a small smile and Jace blinked before there was a rush of happy pheromones that made her wolf uncurl and preen and then it was Clary's turn to blink and look away because the happiness on Jace's face and coming from his wolf and through the tentative bond that wasn't _quite_ as frail as it was before was _a lot_.

Sitting at the long dinner table out on the deck, surrounded by Jace's pack, was chaotic to say the least, but that was good, because most of the attention wasn't on Clary, even though she could definitely feel eyes on her. Simon was on one side, and Isabelle was on her other, although most of her support was actually coming from Isabelle, given Simon seemed completely distracted by Jordan on his other side. Opposite them was Magnus, and Clary was already completely in love with him already—if she didn't see him and Alec interact, and see the way Alec seemed to completely soften when Magnus was at his side, in a way that didn't even happen with the rest of his family and pack.

Jace was sitting at the head of the table, which made sense, but there wasn't any rhyme or reason to how people were lined up around the table, no hierarchy like a pack might usually sit, Maia and Alec not on either of his sides. Clary liked it, she liked the casual environment and the way everyone seemed to respect each other—well, except her, most people were still pretty uncertain about her, but they definitely had enough respect for Jace not to interrogate her at the table.

Although, Imogen—who was sitting on Jace's right, with Kaelie on her other side—didn't speak all that much and she had spent most of the meal staring at Clary with a squint, her nose slightly wrinkled as though she smelt something she didn't like.

Clary.

She was assuming that _she_ was the thing that Imogen was smelling that she didn't like.

Will was interesting, he wasn't sitting at the table, he was sitting on the wide, flat balusters of the deck next to Max, the two of them easily getting on, Will seemingly more comfortable in Max's company than most of the older werewolves, based on what Clary had seen in her short time here. Her eyes moved to the table and took in Maia, who was sitting opposite Jordan and was talking to Helen and Magnus, but her gaze returned to her mate and to Simon every few minutes, and _she_ could see something there, just like Clary could, but her gaze wasn't angry or possessive, it was contemplative, and Clary made _another_ note to herself that she was going to have to bring Jordan up with Simon when they left.

"Can you pass the salt, Clary?" Aline asked and Clary flashed a quick smile before reaching for the salt and passing it over to Aline, needing to reach past Isabelle slightly to do it, and making eye contact with Jace, given he was past Aline, at her end of the table. His expression was warm, leaning back in his seat, clearly comfortable and sated from the food, and Clary paused, feeling that warmth inside her, not just coming from Jace, but feeling it from his pack as well, through him, because it wasn't as though she had that bond with them yet. But it felt so nice, and so pure, and so _different_ to what she had experienced from pack before, even with Luke and her mother, and her forehead creased after a moment. Jace seemed to sense her shift in mood, even with everything that was happening around them, and he leaned forward slightly in his chair before Imogen was speaking up.

"Kaelie, dear, help Jace start to clear the table, won't you?" Imogen's voice was light but her intent was clear, and from the way that Isabelle stiffened slightly beside Clary, she knew that the moment between her and Jace _had_ been recognized, and Imogen was purposefully interrupting. She didn't say anything, because it wasn't the time, and she picked up the glass of water that she had switched to after her second glass of wolfsbane wine. The table got even louder as the pack all started to clear things off, Clary helping where she could but feeling a bit awkward and in the way, even though Simon was clearly right at home next to Jordan and even Maia as she joined the two men, and she was taking a few calming breaths when Helen came over, Alessa in her arms, the little girls wispy blonde hair starting to form loose curls and her blue eyes wide.

"How you feeling?" Helen asked with a soothing smile, and even though anyone who wanted to could have listened in on their conversation and heard the question, Clary still felt a lot more at ease, able to sense how genuine the other werewolf was being.

"Yeah, I'm good," Clary replied with a smile and Helen just nodded, not looking as though she believed her but accepting her answer.

"Well, I have to go and get this monkey to bed, she didn't have her nap today," she rubbed her nose against the top of Alessa's head a few times and there was quiet giggle from the girl that was absolutely endearing. "But it was really good to meet you. We should go out for coffee sometime? Or a run?" Clary's eyes widened at the offer and she felt some of the tension in her shoulders just release, at the fact that Helen wanted to spend more time with her. That she clearly hadn't screwed up _that_ much, even though it felt as though she had been quiet and on the wrong foot all night. Although as soon as those thoughts came, she tried to beat them off with a stick, her wolf restless, because she hadn't come here to be judged, or to self-judge, it was because she was finally in a place where she was ready to get to know her mates pack.

"Yeah," Clary said softly. "That sounds good." Helen's smile widened, and there was a spark of gold in her eyes as she nodded before she was walking away and Clary took in a deep breath as she pulled her phone out of her pocket, tapping out a quick message to Simon, telling him that she was ready to go. When she looked back up, Maryse was standing there, no smile on her face, but not looking anywhere near as confrontational as she had when she had first come on and practically _glared_ at Clary. "Hi," she said, clearing her throat and glad that her voice didn't come out tentative. She was still standing out on the deck, her glass of water in her hand, the big double doors of that lead into the lounge wide open where some of the pack were gathered, and the other door that lead into the kitchen also open and clattering noises coming from where Aline, Maia and Max were doing the dishes. The breeze was nice and not too cool, and Maryse's scent wasn't abrasive as she approached Clary.

"You did well tonight," Maryse said simply and Clary couldn't help but let out a short laugh.

"Right," she murmured.

"Don't worry about Imogen," Maryse's lips curved upward in a knowing smile, small but familiar and as though she was inviting Clary in on a secret. "She takes a long time to warm up to anyone." Clary's wolf couldn't help but also note that it seemed like there was maybe more to it, given Imogen's clear bias toward Kaelie. "She knows that Jace has been in a lot of pain and she just wants to protect him. He's already lost his mother and father, she doesn't want him to lose anyone else." That made Clary stop, heart stuttering a little in her chest at the realization that it wasn't _just_ because Imogen knew Kaelie and had a connection with her, but also because obviously, Kaelie hadn't been one a large contributing factor of her grandsons pain for so many years, and she forced herself to take in another deep breath.

"What about the rest of you?" She asked boldly and Maryse's smile grew, just a little, eyes glinting.

"He's been through a lot. You've been through a lot," she shrugged a shoulder and gave Clary almost a motherly smile. "I think you both have your head screwed on right, you'll figure it out." Clary didn't know how to respond, and Maryse didn't seem to expect a response, and then Simon was walking over, his scent comforting and his eyes flicking between Clary and Maryse as though trying to judge if she was okay, and she shot him a quick smile to reassure him.

"You ready to go?" Simon said as he reached them and Maryse stepped back to include Simon in a sort of semi-circle with them.

"It was good to meet you as well, Simon," Maryse smiled at him and Simon gave her a grin back, easy now since he knew that Clary didn't feel uncomfortable. "We'll be seeing you around a lot more, I hope."

"Of course," Simon threw his arm around Clary's shoulders, smiling widely at Maryse. They sort of called out their goodbyes, not lingering and dragging things out. Simon stood at the bottom of the steps with Maia and Jordan while Jace walked Clary to the car.

"So that...Happened?" Jace sounded awkward and Clary let out a laugh that he joined in on, and it felt good, releasing the tension together, even though that tension for some reason suddenly felt as though Clary was on a high school date after meeting the parents for the first time.

"I'll text you, okay?" She said, nudging him with her elbow and Jace nodded, and she sensed relief coming off him. There was a split second of awkwardness that was quelled quickly when Jace leaned in, wrapping an arm around her back and tugging her in for a hug that didn't last anywhere near as long as Clary's wolf wanted it to, but given she could actually _see_ Will and Max and Isabelle watching them out the kitchen window, and neither of them were here to put on a show.

"Thank you for coming," Jace murmured as he pulled back and his hand fell, down to where Clary's was hanging at her side, and he squeezed her fingers briefly.

"Yeah," Clary nodded, her throat tightening a little but she swallowed hard as she heard Simon approaching the car. "I'll see you soon."

Jace was left as the only one standing on the deck after the car had disappeared down the driveway. The sun had almost completely set and the doors were being closed up to stop any bugs from getting inside. Maryse and Imogen were in the kitchen with Kaelie and Isabelle, getting dessert ready, and Robert and Alec were in the lounge with Max, Helen and Maia watching some video that Max was streaming to the TV from Youtube. Jace could feel that his pack was content and happy, and Clary and Simon's scent was still lingering, twined with all of theirs in a way that felt right.

"She did well," Will's voice was abrupt and had a slight teasing lilt to it, but wasn't straight out sarcasm, which Jace appreciated. "She kept her head up, even with good ol' mum glaring at her every second." Jace couldn't help but let out a laugh, because the door to the kitchen was still open, and Imogen would have _definitely_ heard that, and there was no way Will wasn't going to be getting a slap up the back of the head from good ol' Imogen. "I like her."

"I do too," Jace mumbled and Will snorted, nudging his nephew with his elbow before heading inside and leaving him with his thoughts.


End file.
